Middle-aged female suit: Yeah, that place has pretty good sandwiches. Plus, there's someone there I want to fuck.

Colonial Place Office Building
Arlington, Virginia

Female co-worker: My uncle just bought a condom in Brooklyn. It’s a real nice place.
Male co-worker: Really?
Female co-worker: Uh huh.

99 Church Street
New York, New York

Manager at meeting: Dusty is the only person cooperating here–he hasn't said a thing!

Carrollton, Texas

Dude #1: Hey, thanks dude, you really didn’t have to.
Dude #2: Oh, that’s okay, man — no problem.
Dude #1: So, how did you know I liked princesses?

Peachtree Street
Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: lesley

Attorney: Okay, lay down on your desk.
Paralegal: Okay, but don’t look at my butt.
Attorney, after long pause: Wow, you have an amazing pain tolerance!

Burien, Washington

Overheard by: third wheel

Executive: You know it’s been a productive day when you smell as bad as I do right now.

6423 Wilshire Boulevard
Los Angeles, California

Admin: Hey, Simon Wiesenthal died! Who’s he?
Suit: Oh, he hunted Nazis or something. Cool!
Admin: Cool that he died?
Suit: Cool that he’s in my dead pool!

1600 Broadway
Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: C. O’ntracter

Associate #1: Well, you look nice today.
Associate #2: Stop being mean to me!

11755 Wilshire Boulevard
Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: AJ Feuerman

Businessman: You know, it’s so nice when you have nice pants. You want to go out of your way to do things.

512 7th Avenue
New York, NY

Inadequate manager called Chris*, muttering quietly to himself in different voices: You're a hero, Chris. (pause) I know I am, Chris, I'm a real hero. (pause) Chris, I'm just the best.

Council Office