Pregnant coworker: Do you see this? I’m writing my name on the milk container so she won’t drink out of it! I should probably label it “breast milk”.
Male coworker: That might not stop her.
Huntington, New York
Pregnant coworker: Do you see this? I’m writing my name on the milk container so she won’t drink out of it! I should probably label it “breast milk”.
Male coworker: That might not stop her.
Huntington, New York
Coworker #1: So, good weekend?
Coworker #2: I’m kinda beat. I was on my knees, hoeing all weekend.
Coworker #1: Ummm….Excuse me?
Coworker #2: Oh. That didn’t come out right. Maybe I should’ve just said ‘gardening.’
21500 Haggerty Road
Northville, Michigan
Boss: Alright everyone, I’m leaving for the day. Everyone knows my cell phone number, right?
Peon: 1-800-sex?
Northern Iowan
Cedar Falls, Iowa
Employee on phone: Last name is “Loveless,” as in Artemus Loveless from Wild Wild West. You know, the movie with Will Smith? (awkward pause) Well, I loved the movie.
Bethesda, Maryland
Overheard by: WillSmithFan1
Office worker to colleague: Did you just ask a copywriter how to spell “hmmm”?
London
England
Worker #1: [Sneezes.][Several moments pass.]Worker #2: Oh… Bless you.
Worker #1: Thanks, Merry Christmas.
Los Angeles, California
Supervisor: Don’t forget to call [Kwok]. He’s got a couple of huge boxes and I think they’re computers.
Admin: Which one is [Kwok]?
Supervisor: The short Asian guy.
Admin on phone: Hi [Kwok], it’s [Jane]. I just wanted to let you know you have a huge package.
470 Atlantic Avenue
Boston, Massachusetts
Employee #1: So my car got hit in the parking lot yesterday.
Clueless employee: Yeah, I've gotten banged a few times in the parking lot.
Employee #2, choking on bagel: Cough, cough!
Clueless employee: Wow, are you okay?
Employee #2: Yeah, (coughs) I need to leave the room… fast.
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: That's what she said…
Guy: I used to work in an inner city office.
Girl: Really?
Guy: Yeah, I learned lots of words from them. Like ‘booyah’. It means ‘good.’ Like, ‘That is booyah!’
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: The Intern
Coworker #1, walking down hallway: What's so wrong with beating dead whores?
Coworker #2: I don't really know what to say right now.
Coworker #1: See! In this morning's meeting nobody else said anything about it either. I was just saying that we need to stop talking about the budget because it's like beating dead whores. Like that saying goes. But the conversation just kind of stopped.
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Jen
