Female worker: I've been here so long, I can think of a million ways to get back at you.
Male worker: I'll just come in and start throwing water balloons.
Female worker: That's like stabbing, though.
Wall Street
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Tonic
Frazzled coworker who brought her kids to work for lunch: If you touch your sister again I'm going to break all of your fingers off.
Son: Awwww, but I need all my fingers!
Palm Desert, California
Angry customer on phone: Where are you located at?
CSR: Iowa.
Angry customer on phone: I outta come there and kick your ass!
Calm CSR: With all due respect sir, bring it. (hangs up)
Boyrum
Iowa City, Iowa
Overheard by: Cube Mate
Forgetful manager: Fool me once… Um… Shame on me… Fool me twice… And… I'll have to file a disciplinary report on you.
Boulder, Colorado
Overheard by: clang
Office drone #1: Wow, look at the weather out the window!
Office drone #2: Oh my god, the nothing is coming!
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Neverending Story of Boredom
Girl #1: Why you got that scary picture as your wallpaper?
Girl #2: It’s not scary. It’s a pretty field and a tree.
Manager: It looks like Teletubbies are gonna walk over the hill and kill us all.
Girl #1: Why you gotta be so scary? Why can’t you have a normal desktop picture? Like Betty Boop?
Purchase, New York
Overheard by: Is my life really like this?
Talkative grunt: That was a joke. I’m a comedian. Don’t worry. I’ll be here all week.
Boss walking by: Don’t count on it.
Senlac Drive
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: I miss the days of job security
Secretary: Stop it… Stop it! I will menstruate all over you!
Citic Tower
Hong Kong
China
Priest: … And, as always, during the collection– Is there anyone to do the collection? Lock the doors — nobody gets out.
2026 Guadalupe Street
Austin, Texas
