Red-faced manager: Frozen again! God fucking dammit! Jesus fucking Christ! I'm getting really fucking pissed off at this motherfucking computer!
Nonchalant passerby: Kick it, then.
Plymouth, Michigan
Red-faced manager: Frozen again! God fucking dammit! Jesus fucking Christ! I'm getting really fucking pissed off at this motherfucking computer!
Nonchalant passerby: Kick it, then.
Plymouth, Michigan
Coworker #1: About that e-mail you sent… Do you want me to copy the file onto a disc and mail it or do you want me to send the file as an e-mail attachment?
Coworker #2: So you can't just copy the file to a disc and e-mail the disc?
Brentwood, Tennessee
Employee: Hi.
Receptionist (without looking up): Hi.
(employee walks behind desk)
Receptionist (still not looking) What are you doing?
Employee: Shredding.
Receptionist (looks up confused): What?
Employee (turns on machine): Wow, your shredder is really slow.
Receptionist: That’s the laminator.
San Jose, California
Overheard by: Walking to the Bathroom
Co-worker #1: Why are you sitting there starring at your monitor while the computer is off?
Co-worker #2: Because I recieved a server message stating that it was going to install something on my computer and that I should save everything before 15 minutes are up because the system will shut down.
Co-worker #1: Did you save everything?
Co-worker #2: Yes.
Co-worker #1: Did the computer shut down by itself?
Co-worker #2: Yes.
Co-worker #1: So, why are you sitting there starring at the monitor while the computer is off?
Co-worker #2: I’m waiting for the computer to start back up.
Co-worker #1: Have you pressed the power button?
Co-worker #2: No.
1000 Jerry St. Pe’ Highway
Pascagoula, Mississippi
Cube rat #1: Hey Chris, go install this on Ben's computer.
Cube rat #2: (lets out audible fart)
Cube rat #1: Never mind.
Cube rat #2: Hey, I'm only getting two bars for my laptop's Wi-Fi connection.
Cube rat #3: It's because that damn fart cloud is out blocking the signal!
Columbia, South Carolina
Overheard by: Cube Rat Holding Nose
Engineer: So, this system should give the operators a maximum of 200 blisters per minute.
Cambridge, Ontario
Canadia
Coworker, trying to help another with computer problem: Can I just touch your mouse? Sometimes it helps me think.
Fall River, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Ben
Salesman, displaying new kind of cabinet: So, as you can see, it's very sturdy and designed to last.
Female CEO: I can see that… I like a good long screw
Victoria
Australia
Overheard by: So do I
Tech support girl: So, what should I tell them? They say their internet is slow.
Tech support supervisor: Tell them to suck my big brown dick.
Ontario
Canadia
Server manager: Sheffield Hallam… Is that a Poly University?
Web marketer: Dunno, ask the Googleverse.
Server manager, darkly: I will ask the Googleverse.
Dotcom Company
England
Overheard by: Tim C
