We're Still Living Under the Same Roofie

Cubicle dweller on phone: Nah, she's not been banging me very much. I think I'm banging her more than she's banging me.

Conway, Arkansas

Posted on April 19, 2019
Arkansas, Employees, On the phone, Sexuality

I Totally Would've Said You Were Five-and-a-Half, at Best

Editor: This story is too long. We've got to whack off about eight inches here.

Modesto, California

Posted on April 15, 2019
Body Parts, California, Sexuality, Writers and Editors

It Does Seem That the Planet Has Enough People

Woman on phone: So, the reason he can’t cum is because he virtually has no sperm count. No sperm at all. That’s such a relief!

Rochelle Park, New Jersey

Overheard by: Rosie

Posted on April 9, 2019
Coworkers, Gripes, Health & Hygiene, New Jersey, On the phone, Sexuality

Like Giant Dildos.

Executive director, discussing clients: We can't touch them physically, but we can touch them with things.

Louisville, Kentucky

Posted on March 31, 2019
Compare and contrast, Executives, Kentucky, Sexuality, Weirdness

My Oxygen Mask Has Deployed, See?

CEO to receptionist: I’m not touching myself! I’m having an underwear emergency.

Parnell
Auckland
New Zealand

Posted on March 20, 2019
Clothes, Compare and contrast, Default, Executives, New Zealand, Sexuality, Weirdness

Thanks, John

Elderly customer to account rep/receptionist: You are my favorite call girl.

Bourbonnais, Illinois

Posted on March 10, 2019
Compliments, Customers, Illinois, On the phone, Receptionists, Sexuality, Weirdness

5PM That’s a Wrap

Male developer: I want to make sure the data loaded correctly, pardon me if I’m a bit anal
Female project manager: I enjoy anal.

2025 Euclid Avenue
Cleveland, Ohio

Posted on March 7, 2019
Bosses, Comebacks, Midwest, Ohio, Possible Sexual Harassment, Sexuality, Tech People

2PM Routine Transaction

Teller: Sir, can you please send in your ID since you want to cash this check

Customer: Well, there’s a problem. I lost my ID, but I can give you my social security number, birthday, and even tell you the last several transactions on my account to verify.

Teller: Ok, what’s your birthday and social?

Customer: [gives information]

Teller: Ok, what were the last three charges on your account?

Customer: [gives information]

Teller: So…what’s this $450 charge Passion Parties?

Customer: [Laughter] Uh, that’s something my wife is involved in.

730 Adkins Boulevard
Jackson, Mississippi

Overheard by: Nathan Best

Posted on March 5, 2019
Banking, Customer Service, Customers, Mississippi, Money, Relationships, Sexuality

Yeah, We Read Your Invitation on the Bulletin Board

Team leader: Tomorrow we're having sexual harassment training. (laughs) Jane, you can't touch Sophie.
Male coworker: They can touch me!

Melbourne, Florida

Posted on February 26, 2019
Bosses and Underlings, Florida, Office Politics, Possible Sexual Harassment, Sexuality

Some Jobs Make You Too Tired for Double Entendre

Transportation associate #1: Hey John, are you doing Karen today, or is Mark?
Transportation associate #2: Mark is.
Transportation associate #1: But he's not in his office.
Transportation associate #2: He must be doing it somewhere else, then.

Parkway, Atlanta

Posted on February 25, 2019
Coworkers, Georgia, Questions, Sexuality

Sexuality