Sales

3PM Customer Service

Telephone sales rep at airline company: The flight leaves at 10:30.
… No, TEN THIRTY.
… No, TEN… THIRTY…
… It leaves at ten thirty, yeah.
… no… ten THIRTY…”
… at half past ten…”
… No. No. No… It leaves at TEN THIRTY!
… Half eleven, half past ten, ten THIRTY!
… Yes!
… Would you like to make a reservation?
… a reservation..?
… Would you like to reserve a seat?
[Long pause.] … I have not made a reservation, would you like me to make one for you now?
… At the TEN THIRTY flight?
… Yeah, TEN THIRTY…
… No, you have NO RESERVATION!
… DO. YOU. WISH. TO. MAKE. A. RESERVATION?
… No, you have no reservation.
… You have NO RESERVATION!!!
… SHALL I RESERVE A SEAT?
… THERE IS NO RESERVATION MADE!
[Finally caves] Have a nice flight, madam… Yes, ten thirty. Bye.

The Arken-building
Oernskoeldsvik, Sweden

Dealing with Foul-Mouthed Jerks All Day

Customer: Man, you have a shitty fucking job.
Sales rep: Yeah.

Whitcoulls
Lower Hutt
New Zealand

Overheard by: You Bet I Did

Can I Interest You in Our Conversion Kit?

Male salesperson on phone to female customer: But I can't do that. I can give you a six-inch white one or an eight-inch brown one. I don't have an eight-inch white one!

Majestic Parkway
Bedford Heights, Ohio

Oh, Honey

Oblivious sales rep to gay tech: Do you know how lucky you are, the only guy in here with all these women?

Waukesha, Wisconsin

I Thought His Last Name Was Smith?

Sales manager #1: I just got a contract back from Denmark.
Sales manager #2: Denmark, Germany?
Sales manager #1: No. (pause) Denmark, Denmark.

Resort Hotel
Florida

Overheard by: Underpaid

11AM Smoke Break

Bookseller: I cleaned up all the damn puppets. All of them! Then, watched as a father allowed his children to throw all of them on the floor, play for an hour, then leave them. He grinned at me, said ‘Kids, right?’, then left. It took all I had not to tear that grin off his face, and shove it so far up his fucking ass that I could then reattach it backwards…Wow, four hours really is too long to go without a cigarette!
Cashier: That was the best image I’ve had all day. Go smoke so that I can savor it alone.

430 W Vine Street
Lexington, Kentucky

Overheard by: Laughing coworker

Our Sales Have Been Flaccid As Of Late

Sales guy: Are we penetrating?
Sales gal: It would be great if you could penetrate with us!

McLean, Virginia

'Cause Home Is Where the Pancreas Is

Drug rep: All the regulations in this industry just keep getting more strict all the time. I set up a meeting the other day with one of our medical reps and a doctor I know and I couldn't say a word the entire time except to introduce them. I was like a mouse on the floor.
Admin (laughing hysterically): Do you mean “a fly on the wall”?
Drug rep (embarrassed): Give me a break. It's Friday morning and I'm wearing a suit for a meeting that was canceled and nobody told me. I'm going home!

Arlington, Texas

Overheard by: Genyis

…Why Are You Ladies Fanning Yourselves and Clutching Your Pearls?

Sales to admin: Two rimmers and an in-and-out. That sounds like a good Friday night!

Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: Elizabeth

Where the Distinction Is Irrelevant

General manager to sales guy: You are such a candy-assed, chicken-shit, pansy son of a gun!
Warehouse manager to sales guy: Dude, I’ve dated girls that are more of a man than you are!
Receptionist to warehouse manager: Yeah, but you’re from Jersey.

Kelso Drive
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: Nikki

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