Questions

Employee #1, looking at t-shirt designed by Daisy Fuentes with a spanish word printed on it: God, when did Daisy Fuentes become Spanish?
Employee #2: Hasn't she always been Spanish?
Employee #1: No! She thinks she's so cool she can just decide to be Spanish one day.
Employee #2: But her last name sounds Spanish.
Employee #1, pronouncing it wrong: Fuentes? Whatever, that isn't Spanish. She's so fake. God, I hate people that are fake.

Kohl's Department Store
Minnesota

Overheard by: Expect Great Things

Paralegal: So, should I go ahead and do a dump on the computer?

Seneca Meadows Parkway
Germantown, Maryland

Woman in cubicle on call with overseas agent: Oh, hello… were you in Slumdog Millionaire?
Confused customer service agent: What?

Ottawa
Canadia

Overheard by: poking my eyes out with my pen

Library clerk, exiting elevator: Whooo! It stinks in there! Who just got off of the elevator?
Student worker: (silence)

Fort Worth, Texas

Butch chick: I read The Lion and the Mouse when I was young! It's a story about how the lion got a thorn in his paw and the mouse helped him remove it, and they became friends.
Normal chick: What a stupid lion, why didn't he just eat the mouse?
Butch chick: It's a story of morality for children! Help someone, be friendly!
Normal chick: So?
Butch chick: You don't eat your friends!

Borders
Melbourne Central
Australia

Overheard by: Incognito

Leasing rep: Well, the girl was 14 and her mother's 21! How is she going to learn anything with a mother like that? And the grandmother is only 32!

Randallstown, Maryland

Overheard by: tkap

Boss: So what would be the wider business implamications of this?

Canberra
Australia

Overheard by: glad she wasn’t in that meeting

Female coworker #1, quietly: So have you had any success yet?
Female coworker #2, quietly: No, she won't let me anywhere near her feet.
Female coworker #1: Okay. I'll tell you what you've got to do. (whispers furtively)

Chili, New York

Overheard by: NewGirl

Cubicle mate on phone: Yeah, that’s so me. Wait, now what is this called? Well I’d rather be a dog walker than a porn star!

Topeka, Kansas

Worker: So, what's the plan for today?
Boss (loudly): Same thing as always. (now quietly) …try to take over the world.

Brooklyn Army Terminal
New York City, New York