You'll Just Have to Hunt and Kill Something First

Programmer #1: Oh, man, the PHP meet-up is at a TV shop.
Programmer #3: Yeah, Walt's TV.
Programmer #2: Do you think they have food there?
Programmer #1: I think they have TVs there.

Mesa, Arizona

Overheard by: Chris Cardinal

Posted on February 3, 2010
Arizona, Meals and Snacks, Meetings, Questions, Tech People, TV

While Eating Them, I Pretend to Be a Morbidly Obese Child

Cube dweller: You've never had a Lunchable? They're so fun!

Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: K

Posted on February 2, 2010
Employees, Meals and Snacks, Questions, Washington

No, She Says I Can Have All the Gay Friends I Want

Coworker to another, just back from honeymoon: Hey, that shirt looks like it actually fits. Did the missus pick it out for you? Did she make you go on a diet? Did you stop eating because you're depressed? (waits for an answer, gets none) Do you have to ask your wife for permission to talk to me?

Manhattan, New York

Overheard by: Peezy

Posted on February 2, 2010
Clothes, Coworkers, Diet & Weight, Family, New York, Physical Appearance, Questions

Well, Judging from the Way Your Cubicle Is Ablaze…

Office manager: So, what's beeping down here?
Maintenance guy: Well, we think it's the fire alarm. But we're not sure…

Nashville, Tennessee

Overheard by: cubegirl

Posted on January 29, 2010
Bosses and Underlings, General Idiocy, Questions, Technology, Tennessee

…And I've Been Smoking Out.

Supervisor: How was the soup the clients brought?
Worker: Didn't you get any?
Supervisor: I had a lot of work and by the time I got there it was sublimed.
Worker: “Sublimed”?
Supervisor: Yeah, I used the wrong word. That happens a lot when I'm stressed off.

Culver City, California

Posted on January 27, 2010
California, Dumb Bosses, Employees, Feelings, Meals and Snacks, Questions, Words

Don't Forget I Graduated from Duke

Female coworker, showing toy pig to little girl: Hey, look, this is a kissing pig. Have you ever been kissed by a pig before?
Little girl: No.
Female coworker: I have.

Bloomington, Indiana

Overheard by: Michele

Posted on January 26, 2010
Animals, Coworkers, Indiana, Kids, Questions, Sexuality, Weirdness

Clerk: What Do I Know About the Geography Of Australia?

Older woman to employee: Italy is a country in Rome, right?

Barnes & Noble
Long Island, New York

Overheard by: kristen

Posted on January 26, 2010
Dumb Customers, Employees, General Idiocy, Geography & History, New York, Questions

Like We Do to Welcome New Employees

Loan officer, groaning: What are we going to do with this guy?
Processor: We could always put a dead hooker in his trunk.

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Nikki

Posted on January 25, 2010
Coworkers, Death, Illinois, Questions, Sexuality, Threats

Like Push Them Into the Shape Of a Swan?

Son to mom: Who are the Harlem Globetrotters?
Mom: They're the guys that do tricks with their balls.

Tacoma, Washington

Overheard by: Super Bob

Posted on January 25, 2010
Body Parts, Family members, Parents, Questions, Sports, Washington

Unless I'm Getting Some Really Nice Jewelry Out Of It

Guy intern: So what do you think about girl on girl?
Girl intern #1: I think a tongue is a tongue.
Guy intern: Hmmm? Okay–whatever floats your boat! (to girl intern #2) So what do you think about girl on girl?
Girl intern #2: I think my boat needs to be floating before a tongue is a tongue.

Manhattan, New York

Overheard by: angie c

Posted on January 22, 2010
Body Parts, Compare and contrast, General Idiocy, Interns & Temps, New York, Questions, Sexuality

Questions