Singing employee: Oooh, baaacon weaver! I believe we can reach the morning light!
Kane Hall, University of Washington
Seattle, Washington
Singing employee: Oooh, baaacon weaver! I believe we can reach the morning light!
Kane Hall, University of Washington
Seattle, Washington
Coworker #1: Are you bringing something tomorrow?
Coworker #2: Yeah, but I’m not sure what. Everyone is so hard to please.
Coworker #1: I know. I want to make that pasta dish I told you about, but it has a lot of vegetables. I have to find out who likes what, and what they don’t like. It’d be easier to kill everyone instead.
12300 Olive Boulevard
St. Louis, Missouri
Worker #1: Did you know that Big Lots closed all of its furniture stores down? It was no IKEA but it sure had a few nice things in there. Damn I am full of gas this afternoon.
Worker #2: I didn’t know they had furniture stores…
Worker #1: Yeah…They have surely came a long way since I was a kid. They always had like the crappiest food stuff. They are a close-out store, right?
Worker #2: I didn’t know they had food.
Worker #1: Well, not food food, but like cereal.
Worker #2: Oh, shelf food. Yeah.
Worker #1: Yeah..I would totally not buy discontinued bananas. That’s just rank.
1 Easton Oval
Columbus, Ohio
Boss: I think I'll have a sandwich now.
Employee: Okay, cool.
Boss: What's cool about that?
Employee: Nothing.
Boss: Why'd you say it then?
Employee: You're so difficult!
Boss: No, you're difficult!
New Zealand
Overheard by: Schmitty
Woman to child: Some people are just wicked. Put that pumpkin back.
Wal-Mart
Aberdeen, Washington
Employee at microwave: You know those meatballs have meat in them?
Microwaving employee: Right? Hence, meatballs.
Employee at microwave: Don’t you know the day?
Microwaving employee: Sure, it is Friday all day.
Employee at microwave: Well, it’s Lent, too.
Microwaving employee: You don’t say… Seeing as how I am a big Jew we don’t celebrate that.
Tinley Park, Illinois
Teacher to students, in creepy deep voice: Want a lollipop? I have many flavors!
Sydney
Australia
Defiant executive: I busted up a funeral procession on my way back from lunch. Can’t wait for that karma.
Wausau, Wisconsin
Worker chick, looking at something on floor: What is that?
Worker guy #1: Oh, that’s a… crab.
Worker chick: We have crabs?
Worker guy #1: Yeah, I see them in the parking lot, too!
Worker guy #2: Soup!
Cypress and Westshore
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: wish I had protection…
Office lady #1: As soon as you put out cookies or candy or whatever, people around here descend on it. They're like cockroaches.
Office lady #2, eating free candy: Oh, thank you very much! I'm a cockroach, am I?
Office lady #1: Fine. It's like magic, okay?
Office lady #2: Magical cockroaches?
Office lady #1: Magical cockroaches.
Office lady #2: Well, it's good to know that at least I'm a magical cockroach.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Rose Fox
