Attorney: I heard [the client] was whiny.
Client in waiting room: I’m whiny because I’m sick and this is the first time I’ve left the house.
Attorney: Oh shit.
110 N. Washington Street
Rockville, Maryland
Overheard by: Joan
Attorney: I heard [the client] was whiny.
Client in waiting room: I’m whiny because I’m sick and this is the first time I’ve left the house.
Attorney: Oh shit.
110 N. Washington Street
Rockville, Maryland
Overheard by: Joan
Coworker, on taking kids to get flu shots: When I took them, they were great. They only cried a little. My daughter said, “daddy, I feel safer doing shots with you.”
Grapevine, Texas
50-something admin talking about a gay couple she knew in the past: Back then there was an astigmatism associated with it.
Medical Center
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: Wow am I glad my last day is in a week.
Broker #1: Okay, here's one: would you rather lick the bulge on Jimmy's leg or eat the skin that Richard peeled off his foot last year?
Broker #2: As sick as this sounds, I'd take Jimmy's bulge in a second. I had to sit next to Richard. His foot had a crack in it so deep you could stick a pencil in it.
Chicago, Illinois
Co-worker #1: Hey, tell them that story you were telling me the other day. The one about Burger King.
Co-worker #2: What story about Burger King?
Co-worker #1: You know…you were with your dad or your father-in-law…
Co-worker #2: The story where my father had a heart attack because of a Burger King sandwich?
Co-worker #1: …Yeah.
Co-worker #2: That’s the story.
312 Plum Street
Cincinnati, Ohio
Worker, entering building and chuckling: I already wiped ya clean one time!
Chesapeake, Virginia
Writer: You know what I think? I think Jerry Lewis wakes up every morning just scared out of his mind that they'll actually find a cure for muscular dystrophy.
Scottsdale, Arizona
Biotech guy: Before you kill it, can I have the germplasm that is causing the issue?
St. Louis, Missouri
Co-worker #1: Have you ever been to Greece?
Co-worker #2: Yup.
Co-worker #1: Did you go see ruins of Pantheos?
Co-worker #2: You mean, “the Parthenon?”
Co-worker #1: Yeah, that’s it! Aw man, today I’ve got…what’s that called?
Co-worker #2: Stupid?
Co-worker #1: Ha, ha. Very funny. No…oh! Mind dyslexia!
Co-worker #2: As opposed to body dyslexia?
216 W. Jackson Boulevard
Chicago, Illinois
Sales rep on phone to customer: I thought about you in the shower this morning. I know that probably sounds weird but I think about my customers all the time.
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Wonder if he made the sale…
