Writer: You know what I think? I think Jerry Lewis wakes up every morning just scared out of his mind that they'll actually find a cure for muscular dystrophy.
Scottsdale, Arizona
Writer: You know what I think? I think Jerry Lewis wakes up every morning just scared out of his mind that they'll actually find a cure for muscular dystrophy.
Scottsdale, Arizona
30-year old accounting manager to 23-year old employee: So, my mom has a crush on you after seeing your picture on my Facebook profile.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: Cougar Bait
EA: …she’s still learning to change a diaper and all that.
Suit: Really?
EA: Yeah, but it’s been extra hard emotionally because our family is really strict and my dad still can’t admit to himself that this happened. All he’s said is, “I sent you to private school! Don’t they have sex ed there?” and “How could this happen?” Which doesn’t help her at all.
Suit: No, probably not.
EA: It’s like, “Dad, the baby is already here, get a grip.” But, well, she’s the baby of the family and I guess we all know how fathers are.
Suit: No, actually, I don’t. I never met mine.
40 IDX Drive
South Burlington, Vermont
Overheard by: Bubble Wrap THIS
Recent male college grad: So I just quit my job…
Recent female college grad: Oh my god, that’s awesome!
Recent male college grad: I love our age group- everyone’s excited and envious of me -and not appalled…
San Francisco, Califronia
Overheard by: Still Employed… Unfortunately
Female boss to male underling, about predicted upcoming snow storm: Tell me how many inches it is and then I'll decide if I have to be afraid of it!
Felton, Delaware
Girl applying for marriage license, to fiance: You sure you want to do this?
Fiance to girl: Who else am I gonna marry?
Girl to clerk: Is this the same place you come for divorce too?
Clerk of Court Office
Titusville, Florida
Overheard by: Tricia
CSR: Nancy had, like, a nervous breakdown after a phone call that lasted an hour and a half. I felt bad for her, but it was also kinda cool. It was like watching glass shatter.
Newton, Massachusetts
Girl #1: I feel bad for that kid, Matt*.
Girl #2: Which one? That loud kid?
Girl #1: Well yeah, the loud kid, but he has Asperger's syndrome, so he kind of doesn't get it, you know?
Guy: I once had a roommate that thought he had Asperger's, and I was always like, “man, shut up. You just did too much coke again.”
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
Frustrated coworker to outside vendor: I must have gotten the confused department, because they don't know what they're doing.
East Petersburg, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Michelle
Male staff member: Yeah, but knowing my luck, it'll happen again when I'm not here!
Female staff member: It's okay. You're married now. You'll get lucky one day!
Blockbuster
Australia
