Intern: It was an honor to wear your sister’s undergarments.
Las Vegas, Nevada
Intern: It was an honor to wear your sister’s undergarments.
Las Vegas, Nevada
Accountant: A Charlie Brown Christmas was on the other day and me and my sister were watching it when Peppermint Patty opened her mouth and a man’s voice popped out. I turned to my sister and said: “Oh my god! Peppermint Patty’s a big ol’ dyke! Turn that damn thing off!”
Secretary: I was raised by a lesbian couple.
Accountant: Oh… Oh, I’m sorry.
Sixth Avenue
Nashville, Tennessee
Resident doctor: Hey! How was the concert? I’m sorry I missed it.
Pre-med: What concert?
Resident doctor: Your dad’s concert.
Pre-med: Oh, it was more like a hoe-down.
Resident doctor: Was there promenading?
Pre-med, nodding head in agreement: There was some promenading.
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: snickerpants
Sales rep: Mmmm… This is good. What is this? Harry and David. Oh… So it’s that kind of thing. No, I think they’re brothers, actually.
Forsyth Road
Macon, Georgia
Coworker on the phone with her daughter: The days of getting free stuff just because you’re cute are over.
County School Office
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Someone who’s convinced those days are never over
Man diva: I mean, I cannot believe my little brother didn’t notice that stain for five hours! How can you think it’s water when it doesn’t dry for five hours?
Girl: Well maybe he wasn’t paying attention. It was your grandfather’s funeral.
Man diva: Ohmigod it’s like seven inches across the cuff!
Girl: I’m sure there’s somewhere you can still wear them?
Man diva: Yeah, if somebody has a stain party!
Brooklyn, New York
Overheard by: Dry cleaner no good
Female cube worker #1: Have you ever heard of that black and blue ball thing? You know I would never go to that.
Female cube worker #2: Oh yeah?
Female cube worker #1: Yeah. My uncle and brother go to that. And my uncle only wears chaps.
Supervisor walking by: Are you guys working?
Male cube worker: Anyways, why don’t you go?
Female cube worker #1: Well, frankly I just wouldn’t want to see them in that state.
Taylor Avenue
Winnipeg, Manitoba
Canadia
Investment broker: My kid’s a socialist. He’d rather hang out with his friends than ski with us.
Portland Square
Portland, Maine
Diner in expensive restaurant, arguing over the bill for his family Christmas party: This wine is a lot cheaper in the grocery store!
Manager: And what would your in-laws think of you if you had the family Christmas party in isle three of a super Wal-Mart?
Illinios Street
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Man on phone: What do you mean he’s not dead? I’ve bought his wife a card and put it through the door!
Leatherhead
Surrey
England
Overheard by: Bav
