Female employee on cell: You think he still loves me?…No, I think I peed myself right off that pedestal.
201 North Washington Street
Alexandria, Virginia
Overheard by: Mandi
Female employee on cell: You think he still loves me?…No, I think I peed myself right off that pedestal.
201 North Washington Street
Alexandria, Virginia
Overheard by: Mandi
Customer: Umm… Excuse me, do you have that book?
Bookstore employee: Do you know the title?
Customer: No.
Bookstore employee: Do you know the author?
Customer: Uh… No, but they wrote that other book.
Bookstore employee: Do you know where the other book is in the shop?
Customer, brightly: Yeah! It's over there somewhere! (points behind himself to the entire shop)
Darwin
Australia
Supervisor: This was supposed to be done hours ago, what is taking so long?
Employee: I was too busy working on my resume so I can get a better job.
Park Avenue
New York City, New York
Analyst to lackey: I don't think it makes any sense to run around playing “battleship” with analysts' Outlook calendars.
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Rachael
Manager on phone, walking out of back office: Shut up! Just shut up! Jesus Christ! (hangs up phone).
(scared clerk is dead silent)
Manager: What? She's a bitch!
(phone rings)
Customer: Did I walk in on something?
Manager (calmly): Go to hell, mom. (angrily) I said go to hell! Die, bitch, die! (hangs up phone)
Scared clerk: You walked in on every day at this place. (shudders)
Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Boss, reading through company e-mails: Can I talk to you about this e-mail you sent to a client?
Employee: Sure.
Boss: In this e-mail you started out with the word “yay”; when I read this it struck me as very unprofessional. You shouldn't use the word “yay” when speaking with our clients.
Employee: That doesn't say “yay, it says “yeah”. It's a response to a question the client had.
Boss: Y-e-a-h is “yay.” Let's not use it in e-mails in the future, okay?
Employee: Okay (then under breath as he walks away) Fucking moron!
Salt Lake City, Utah
Mailman: Is this the 3rd floor?
Receptionist: No, this is the 2nd floor.
Mailman: But isn't the next floor like the …4th floor?
Receptionist: No, that's the 3rd floor.
Mailman (confused): Yo, man, that's weird.
Richmond Street
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: front desk
Coworker: Do house sparrows fight to the death?
Nashua, New Hampshire
Big boss, telling off peon: You need to look around for work yourself when you're done and the supervisors are busy.
Male manager: Look on desks, in drawers.
Big boss: You might not be comfortable with going through others' drawers, but…
Female manager: You can go through my drawers any time.
Peon: That terrifies me.
Hindmarsh
Adelaide
Australia
