Female coworker: Does your water bottle say “beaver sports”?
Male coworker: Yes. Beaver sports has been in my life as long as I can remember.
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Female coworker: Does your water bottle say “beaver sports”?
Male coworker: Yes. Beaver sports has been in my life as long as I can remember.
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Coworker: This one student went to school in New Mexico, so that's a foreign school, right?
Boss: Um… No, New Mexico is a state.
Coworker: Oh, really? New Mexico is a part of the United States?
Portland, Maine
26-year-old virgin to cubicle neighbor: So, my windshield has been leaking all around the edge, like that rubber seal thing is cracked.
Coworker, loud enough for whole office to hear: You just need some caulk! (pause) Both kinds…
Sea-Tac, Washington
Coworker to another who has just put basket on his head: It's like you're playing “Amish tron” or something…
Hollywood, California
Overheard by: scrapes
Coworker to another: Shut up, at least my husband lies to me!
Waco, Texas
Overheard by: Chris
Cubicle worker #1: I was just next to what I commonly refer to as a “master blaster” in the men's john a minute ago…
Cubicle worker #2: Go on…
Cubicle worker #1: I think he barely had a chance to get his pants down before the gates of hell opened and all were consumed with fire and explosions of various forms…
Cubicle worker #1: I was trying not to laugh in the stall next door.
Cubicle worker #2: What the fuck!
Cubicle worker #1: It just goes to show. No matter how nice a person's shoes, they can still be ugly on the inside. His shoes were very nice, after all. A black patent leather cap toe, I believe.
Cubicle worker #2: Everyone shits.
Cubicle worker #1: I didn't get too good a look in my haste to retreat, lest I have to endure uncomfortable eye contact subsequently.
Moreno Valley, California
Overheard by: Joe P
Illustrator #1: What is the difference between a libertarian and a Republican?
Illustrator #2: Do you know what a Vulcan is?
Illustrator #1: Uh… I guess, like Mr Spock.
Illustrator #2: Well, a Republican is to a libertarian what a Vulcan is to a Romulan.
Illustrator #1: What the hell is a Romulan?
Illustrator #2: Well, they look like Vulcans, but they are more… Well, on the original show they represented the USSR.
Illustrator #1: So, a libertarian is a communist?
Illustrator #2: Well, no. Okay, do you know what a Centauran is?
Illustrator #1: No, and please don't tell me.
Greenville, Texas
Overheard by: Michael Philippus
IT worker: So what do you want to call your server?
Female coworker: How about Skynet? Everybody loves Skynet!
Male coworker: If you call it Skynet I will stab you in the eye.
Female coworker: Well, everyone except him.
North Queensland
Australia
Overheard by: Sarah Connor
Coworker on conference call: I thought you were on booty call!
Windsor Mill, Maryland
