Electrical foreman on radio to electrician: Okay, here goes.
Electrician: We've got a huge electrical arc goin' on here!
Electrical foreman: Well, don't touch it!
Electrician: Well, fuckin' duh! Er, I mean… 10-4.
Phoenix, Arizona
Electrical foreman on radio to electrician: Okay, here goes.
Electrician: We've got a huge electrical arc goin' on here!
Electrical foreman: Well, don't touch it!
Electrician: Well, fuckin' duh! Er, I mean… 10-4.
Phoenix, Arizona
Office drone: Well, in the past I'd seen him hand out stuffed animals and candy to kids, but this year he didn't do that… from what I saw.
Prosser, Washington
Overheard by: was santa in a windowless van
Coworker on cell: I have a confession to make fast, horse peeps! Are you ready for this? (pause) The reason I have to go home is to do number two. Because last time I think it came out like a subway sandwich. And the toilet doesn?t work upstairs anymore. (pause) Yes, that was me! So there, I feel better now.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: Trevor Arnold
Coworker #1: What should I name my font?
Coworker #2: What about Kont?
Coworker #1: Ew!
Coworker #2: What? Oh, “Kont” sounds like” cunt.”
Coworker #1: That just happened. Gross!
California
Overheard by: g$
Disney peon #1, discussing Jonas Brothers project: “You've just been Jo-Bro'd” sounds so obscene.
Disney peon #2: Yeah, and the tag line is, “packed with more Jonas than you've ever seen.”
(ten minutes later)
Disney peon #3, walking up: I feel like my brain is running out my ears.
Disney peons #1 & #2: You've just been Jo-Bro'd!
Burbank, California
Coworker #1: Veal is unborn calf.
Coworker #2: Unborn? I thought it was just babies.
Coworker #1, somberly: No. Cut 'em right out of the womb.
Coworker #2: I'm never eating veal again.
Coworker #1: That's why it's so tender.
Gainesville, Florida
Indian woman: How was your holiday?
White man: Uh, holiday?
Indian woman: Yeah, Rosher Hana?
White man: Rosh Hashanah?
Indian woman: Yeah.
White man: I'm not Jewish.
Indian woman: Oh, you're not?
White man: No. I told you that when you asked me how Passover was.
Indian woman: (silence)
White man: That's okay. That was awhile ago.
Atlanta, Georgia
Office hottie, after office creepster has poked her: Ouch! What was that for?
Office creepster: I just always wondered what it'd be like to poke you.
Office hottie: Oh. It didn't do much for me. How was it for you?
Office creepster: Fucking magic!
Auckland
New Zealand
Overheard by: Kiwibloke
Male coworker: It's small but mighty.
Female coworker #1: Hey, it's not the size that matters!
Male coworker: You're right, it's the bandwidth!
(laughter)
Female coworker #2: We are still talking about the analytics department, right?
Omaha, Nebraska
Overheard by: Mandy
Coworker: With the amount of hours I spent playing WoW, I probably could have graduated college. Oh, well.
Salt Lake City, Utah
