Male co-worker: It just ticks me off that Elmo is more popular than Grover. My other job was really boring, and one day I was fantasizing…
Female co-worker, interrupting: I think we’ve heard enough.
20890 Kenbridge Court
Lakeville, Minnesota
Overheard by: Gigi
Black coworker #1: So I'm trying to end the conversation and rush in my house! Did you think he saw them?
Blonde coworker #2: Of course he saw them! You got the jumbo box of Magnum condoms! Miss “I'm-going-to-save-the-environment, no-I-don't need-a-bag-for-my-inappropriate-groceries!”
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: in the cube away from them!
Co-worker #1: Is that pumpkin cream cheese?
Co-worker #2: I think so.
Co-worker #1: You mean you just blindly put that on your bagel?
Co-worker #2: What else would make it orange?
Co-worker #1: …Um…orange?
Co-worker #2: Yeah, what else is orange but pumpkin?
225 Bush Street
San Francisco, California
Coworker: So this e-mail came in, in Dutch writing, so how would I find out if it came from Australia?
Call Center
Northeast Pennsylvania
Reservationist: I heard that if you get stung by a jellyfish and you put urine on the sting, it'll stop hurting.
Reservationist #2: I'd totally pee on you.
Seattle, Washington
Editor, singing: I’m going to steal your chair when you’re dead!
6th and Lavaca Streets
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: not getting up
Female Co-worker: Even if I was a woman, I wouldn’t put a Chippendales calender on my desk.
12602 W. Bridger Street
Boise, Idaho
Cube rat #1: Um… Where’d they put the fridge that was here?
Cube rat #2: I don’t know, but I had juice in there. With vodka in it.
63rd Street and Broadway
New York, New York
Woman: I was talking to God the other day, and he told me he’s coming soon, you know?
Man: Well, if he doesn’t show up in half an hour I’m leaving.
Mexico City International Airport
Overheard by: Trece
Joyous cube dweller: Yay! My ass works!
DIT
Lansing, Michigan
Overheard by: Across From The Shit Show
