Boss: Tara, there is a big stack of Christmas cards on your chair. Please put stamps on each one and make sure they are exactly a quarter inch from both the side and the top of the envelope.
Tara, to coworker: Can you bring a ruler over here? I need to put stamps on the Christmas cards.
Old Town
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Glad I'm not the new girl
Coworker: Do you know how many inches are in a yard?
Receptionist: Whose yard?
El Segundo, California
Overheard by: Dave
Female shouting over cube wall: I like to lick the balls before I get rid of them!
Edmonton
Canadia
Overheard by: Hrew
Coworker #1: He’s coming over tonight with that thing you like?
Coworker #2: What?
Coworker #1: You know, that thing you like?
Coworker #2: Girl, that thing got batteries, and that’s what he’s bringing — batteries.
500 King Street
Wilmington, Delaware
Coworker to another, finding that doughnuts are gone: You wanna just lick the box with me?
Fredericksburg, Virginia
Construction worker #1: So you know how I knew you were gay?
Construction worker #2: WHAT?
Construction worker #1: It’s cool, dude. But know how I knew?
Construction worker #2: [shakes head]Construction worker #1: When you started making out with me at happy hour last week.
Construction worker #2: Oh. Oh, yeah.
1670 Broadway
Denver, Colorado
Co-worker #1: Did you know Tony in the German office is Oriental?
Co-worker #2: Asian.
Co-worker #1: What about Asians?
Co-worker #2: You don’t say “Oriental”…you say “Asian.”
Co-worker #1: Oh, that is so PC. Oriental is fine. I had an Oriental friend once and she didn’t mind it.
93 Worcester Street
Wellesley, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Scaught
Sales #1: So what do they get in the three piece table, lamp and mirror set?
Sales #2: You’re kidding, right?
Sales #1: No really, what do they get?
Sales #2: Idiot.
2500 South Rochester Road
Rochester Hills, Michigan
Overheard by: Jenny Schneider
Frustrated employee to dim coworker: If you’d stop being an idiot I wouldn’t have to hate you anymore.
Wausau, Wisconsin
Overheard by: I Feel The Same Way
