He’s Fated to Become the Regional Manager

Employee: Fuck you very much for calling Blockbuster; how may I abuse you?…Oh, hi, Bill* [regional manager]…Yeah, today’s my last day.

Blockbuster
Del Mar, California

Overheard by: Petyr

Posted on August 9, 2019
California, Hiring & Firing, On the phone, Retail

Or Will We Finally Get a Taste?

Suit to a group of coworkers who just crowded into elevator: Do you think we’ll get to talk about Matt’s nuggets at this morning’s meeting?

SoMa
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Green

Posted on August 7, 2019
California, Coworkers, Default, Meetings, Office Politics, Questions, Substance Use & Abuse, Suits

No, That’s Question #15

Nurse, pointing to birth control questionnaire: Ma’am, I think you answered this question incorrectly.
15-year-old girl: No, that’s right.
Nurse: It asks how long you’ve been with your current partner. You said five minutes.
15-year-old girl: That’s how long it took.

616 Court Street
Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: Vicky

Posted on July 29, 2019
California, Comebacks, Health & Hygiene, Nurses, Sexuality, Strangers

And Maybe You Could Spruce It Up a Bit?

Art director to photographer: So, how big is your rack?
(rest of table bursts out laughing)
Art director: Okay! I guess we're all 13 here!
Photographer: You gotta admit, that was good.
Art director: Yeah, it was good.
(at the end of photo shoot meeting)
Art director: Don't forget to bring your rack on Friday!

Van Nuys, California

Posted on July 27, 2019
Age and ageing, Body Parts, California, Designers and Photographers, Sexuality

He’s an Arkansas Leg Hound — Best to Let Him Finish

Camera assistant: Your dog’s getting drunk off my pants.

Culver City, California

Posted on July 27, 2019
California, Interns & Temps, Possible Sexual Harassment

It's Easy to Spot Your Co-Workers Who Were Popular in High School

Cube dweller: Where are my pretzels? I just feel like putting stuff in my mouth.

Scotts Valley, California

Overheard by: Mari

Posted on July 19, 2019
Body Parts, California, Employees, Meals and Snacks, Questions, Sexuality

Two in the Skull

Worker: Didn’t the doctor say that you have to lose weight because it was pressing down on your diaphragm and giving you breathing problems?
A/P drone: Men have diaphragms?

Century City, California

Overheard by: Squelch

Posted on July 9, 2019
California, Dumb Employees, General Idiocy

…Or Am I Thinking Of 2012?

Locksmith: Yeah, you gotta read “1994.” Orson Welles. Really knows his stuff. Everything he wrote in that book is happening right now. You gotta read it.

Sherman Oaks, California

Overheard by: Ja'mie