Coworker: The kung pao chicken had too much pao.
Jersey City, New Jersey
Coworker: The kung pao chicken had too much pao.
Jersey City, New Jersey
Computer guy #1: I can’t see the hard drive on this network.
Computer guy #2: Well, the problem is that the disk isn’t mounted. First you have to mount Claire*.
Claire: Hey!
Computer guy #2: Claire is the name of the office hard drive.
701 South Mount Vernon Avenue
San Bernardino, California
Overheard by: Amused
Worker #1 (singing): Invoices are making me want to kill myself!
Worker #2: The voices make you want to kill yourself?
Worker #1: No! *In*voices!
Worker #2: Phew!
Century City, California
Boss: From now on, people, we’re going to make Perfection our baseline.
The development team laughs.
Developer: Dude, whatever the fuck you’ve been reading, stop it.
1 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Mad William Flint
Mike: What's Linkedin?
Ryan: It's Facebook for professional people.
Mike: Well, I should get on that, because I'm pretty fucking professional!
Wilmington, North Carolina
Bookkeeper: What is Susan’s last name?
Office Manager: Susan who?
812 Moorefield Park Drive
Richmond, Virginia
Receptionist: With a “c”?
(pause)
Receptionist: Catherine with a “c”?
(pause)
Receptionist: Oh, you mean “k” as in “cat”!
Seguin, Texas
Overheard by: Vivian
Phone drone, to subscriber on the phone: Every piece of information subscribers tell me I basically file away in my head as a little piece of information.
Technology Drive
Malvern, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: captainobvious
Lab tech finding other scientists spraying glue: Ahhh! Free isocyanates!
Scientist: Get out of here!
Rockland, Maryland
Overheard by: Chemdork
Prettyish, 20-something salesgirl: I think before the swine flu, no one in this country new what a “swine” even was.
50-something sales manager: Well, that's because it's German. Swinehund! Get it?
Schaumburg, Illinois
