Clueless coworker, holding up bracelet she found at H&M: The store is exactly like Forever 21.
Patienceless coworker, raising eyebrows: No. It's not… at all! Not even remotely.
Clueless coworker: Well, it's kinda sorta similar in some ways.
Sacramento, California
Female coworker: See you Friday!
Leaving employee: I'm off Friday!
Coworker: See you Saturday!
Leaving employee: I'm off Saturday!
Coworker: See you next week! (mutters under breath) I guess that's the only other option.
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: ISPgypsy
IT guy, while waiting for coworker's computer to load: So, what kind of name is your last name, anyways?
20-something coworker: German.
IT guy: Ah… So, you ever been over to those concentration camps? The closest I ever got to was the Holocaust Museum downtown.
Reston, Virginia
Overheard by: Jen
VP, strolling into cube farm: Toasters or toaster ovens?
Staffer #1: Toasters.
Staffer #2: Toasters.
Staffer #3: Toaster ovens!
VP: Toasters, right? We already have a toaster oven.
Staffer #4: Definitely toasters.
Staffer #3: No, toaster ovens!
VP: Wait, I want to hear Alice*'s perspective here.
Staffer #3: Toaster ovens do more and they break less often!
Several other staffers: But toasters are faster!
Staffer #5: Boo!
Staffer #3: Never mind, I withdraw my comments. I'm being booed.
VP: Careful, or you'll get voted off the island!
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Sales rep on phone: So I was bartending over the weekend and this biker comes up to the bar… Sure enough, he had a belt buckle that was a woman's you-know-what pressed up against his waist.
Keene, New Hampshire
Overheard by: Cube 2, row 3
Marketing guy to PR girl: You'd better go home and eat your asparagus and get some sleep, because we have to be up at the crack of shitty dawn tomorrow.
Ontario
Canadia
Guy on phone with one finger stuffed in his ear: I didn't get it, Lisa, what's your dad dying got to do with us not having anal? (pause) What? No sex at all? (pause) Not even a blowjob? Jeez, I mean, why are you acting so weird all of a sudden?
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Saagar
Accountant #1: You know, French onion soup has beef-stock in it.
Accountant #2: But it's not like, real meat, it's just… boiled.
Accountant #1: Don't tell me, tell Jesus!
Albany, New York
Coworker #1: The shit's gonna hit the fan! (group laughter)
Coworker #2: You know, I've actually seen that.
(group pause)
Coworker #1: You see, I used to work on a dairy farm…
Dean's Office, Boston College
Boston, Massachusetts
