Female coworker: I think I’m going to go home. I’m not feeling well.
Gay coworker: I hope it’s not contagious.
Female coworker: No. It’s… woman problems. I don’t think you’ll get infected.
Gay coworker: You’d be surprised.
14th Street and Rhode Island Avenue
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Suprised
Meeting Attendee #1: When’s a good time to schedule the meeting with [Gary]?
Meeting Attendee #2: Well, he will be back from his heart attack next week.
2964 Peachtree Road NW
Atlanta, Georgia
Female coworker: If I don’t get into law school, I’ll just get knocked-up and be a house wife. I call it ‘Plan B.’
910 Louisiana Street
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: I need a backup plan like that
Graphic Designer: So let me know when you can get me that FreeHand job, I’m not busy today.
Art Director: No problem.
650 South 6th Street
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Voice on PA: Attention, Barnes and Noble shoppers, will the customer looking for the ‘Bataan Death March’ please come to the Children’s Department? Thank you.
Southlake, Texas
Yuppie hubby: See anything you like on the wine list?
Wifey: I look for potential baby names whenever I read a wine list. Oooh, ‘Spencer’ — that’s a good one!
Park Street
Orlando, Florida
Coworker #1: You wouldn't believe who just called me. Juan*. I haven't heard from him in six months, and now all of a sudden he thinks I'm going to talk to him again?
Coworker #2, jokingly: Well, maybe he just wants to be good friends.
Coworker #1: You know what? He can just go and be good friends with his horse!
Melbourne, Florida
Woman in lift, noticing man cleaning doors: I can’t believe they clean a fucking elevator shaft, but it takes them a week to clean dried-up vomit in the foyer!
Queen Street
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Admin
50-something American manager: So you're going to Disney World on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving, and coming back Sunday? Have you see our airports when they're busy?
20-something Indian consultant: Have you seen our trains, anytime?
Wayne, New Jersey
Newbie: It's been a long day. A long week, actually.
Senior: It's been a long eight years for me.
Newbie: Wow. How are you still alive?
Senior: I don't know. I'm a soul survivor.
Newbie: Like that Rolling Stones song? Did they write that after you?
Senior: Yep. I'm the only one who can survive in this place.
Bayonne, New Jersey
