Employee: I need the $5. Reimbursement from the basket I bought for the company.
Controller: Okay… I need a receipt.
Employee: I gave it to you.
Controller: When?
Employee: A year and a half ago.
Controller: Are you kidding?
Employee: No.
Lakewood, New Jersey
Health Exec: You working late?
Tech Exec: Nah, downloading porn. You?
Health Exec: Oh, you know it. Nursing administration porn. Woo-hoo!
Tech Exec: Send some my way. I’ll send you some telecommunications porn.
Health Exec: “Oh baby, show me your phone. Let me see your router.” Good times.
595 Market Street
San Francisco, California
Colleague: How long do you think you'll be?
Female colleague: We've just gotta pick up our balls and then we'll come back.
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: confused but amused
Boss to junior staffer: Don't go take a poop and take forever!
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Jeff
Salesman: I am so sorry I am late. My mom forgot to wake me up.
Manager: You’ve got to be kidding me.
740 North Larch Avenue
Elmhurst, Illinois
Overheard by: Albie
Manager: You hear her? Usually, she says, “I’m coming”, and I say “So is Christmas.” But now I guess I could say, “So is”, uh, “the Fourth of July.”
11400 West Olympic Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: lonecomic
Female coworker: I think I’m going to go home. I’m not feeling well.
Gay coworker: I hope it’s not contagious.
Female coworker: No. It’s… woman problems. I don’t think you’ll get infected.
Gay coworker: You’d be surprised.
14th Street and Rhode Island Avenue
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Suprised
Meeting Attendee #1: When’s a good time to schedule the meeting with [Gary]?
Meeting Attendee #2: Well, he will be back from his heart attack next week.
2964 Peachtree Road NW
Atlanta, Georgia
Female coworker: If I don’t get into law school, I’ll just get knocked-up and be a house wife. I call it ‘Plan B.’
910 Louisiana Street
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: I need a backup plan like that
Graphic Designer: So let me know when you can get me that FreeHand job, I’m not busy today.
Art Director: No problem.
650 South 6th Street
Minneapolis, Minnesota
