Time Management

Cube dweller to another: I have time to beat you, but I don't have time to stop.

Malden, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Dan

Worker: Can I take the rest of the day off?
Boss: LetmethinkaboutthatNo.
Worker: Don’t you want to hear why?
Boss: No.
Worker: Some of the guys are going snowmobiling and I wanted to meet up with them…
Boss: What do you think this is, a resort?
Worker: If it were a resort, I wouldn’t have to leave; there’d be things to do.

900 Simpson Street
Saint Paul, Minnesota

Coworker #1: Our annual report is going to be delivered today. Please let me know when it arrives.
Coworker #2: How often do we get that?

University of Michigan, Ann Arbor

Loner geek, answering phone: The Phoenix rises at 3 pm. (hangs up phone)

Washington, DC

Overheard by: Bec215

Worker #1: Hi, Sally*, my ID has expired. How can I get it renewed?
Worker #2: I suppose the other people on our team will also be expiring soon, too. Do we need to address them now, or should we wait ’til they actually expire also?

55 East Hartland Street
East Hartford, Connecticut

Overheard by: Linda BoBinda

Federal employee to coworker in ladies’ room: Darlene, how long is a dog pregnant?

L’Enfant Plaza
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Just a contractor

Reporter to another on deadline day: Hey, you wanna go kick each other in the balls and forget it’s Thursday?

81st Street and Harvard Avenue
Tulsa, Oklahoma

Overheard by: I don’t have balls, but I know the feeling

Boss: So then you and Josh will need to mate together the two documents that you’re sending to customers, and include a note explaining why.
Co-worker: Sounds good. Starting in October, [Nathan] and I will send letters to inform all of our customers about our mating.

9630 S. Norwalk Boulevard
Santa Fe Springs, California

Overheard by: Josh

Broker: I’m going to grab some lunch; if my wife calls, tell her I’m not going down tonight. She’ll just have to wait until tomorrow.

250 West Pratt Street
Baltimore, Maryland

Guy behind counter on cell: So I’ll be there soon….What’s that sound?….Oh, yeah! I thought I heard a tornado in the background!

Hall’s Archery Range
Manchester, England