IT guy to IT manager: Nice shoes, are they new?
IT manager: Yeah, but they’re too clean and white. They need to be scuffed up more.
IT guy: You know what they should do? They should make the seven-year old Taiwanese kids who sew these wear them for a few days first.
IT manager: Yeah, that’s perfect. Pre-scuffed shoes. They’d be flopping around in shoes way too big, but at least they’d have shoes for a few days.
Good Hope Road
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
DBA to male co-worker: I want service! I’m coming to you to be serviced!
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: I thought that belonged in the men’s room…
Internet sweatshop girl: Its getting cold in here!
Internet sweatshop guy: Does it make you want to put on all of your clothes?
Hell’s Kitchen
New York City, New York
IT worker: If you use it a whole bunch of times it will become intuitive.
Madison, Connecticut
Analyst #1: I tried working out last night.
Analyst #2: How much did you lift?
Analyst #1: I had 225 on the bar.
Analyst #2: Did you get it up?
Analyst #1: Nah, I chickened out.
Cookeville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Diddy
Engineer: Did you see that e-mail bob sent?
Technician: Yes, he’s creating an army of idiots in his own image!
Wayne, Pennsylvania
IT nerd: So, we’ll move that code to production at 5 AM on Thursday.
Programmer: Is that in the morning?
Mt. Prospect Plaza, Illinois
Overheard by: smeagol
Software programmer, rapping while coding: Encrypt that shit! Encrypt that shit! Keep those bitches out of our shit!
Peachtree Road
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Chris
Systems administrator: No, it isn’t a flowchart, it’s a chart that just happens to flow.
Aberdeen
Scotland
United Kingdom
Overheard by: Auditor in the corner
.Net developer, finishing a presentation: … And that’s my presentation on .Net custom controls. Any questions about the toggle reader or list controls?
Java developer, bursting at the seams: So it turns out my frat brothers inadvertently stole a human corpse!
Mechanicsburg, Pennsylvania
