Student: Crap, I don’t know how to start.
Teacher: I can’t help you.
Student: Why not?
Teacher: If I knew this kind of crap do you think I’d be working at this ghetto school?
1133 Mission
Oceanside, California
Student: Crap, I don’t know how to start.
Teacher: I can’t help you.
Student: Why not?
Teacher: If I knew this kind of crap do you think I’d be working at this ghetto school?
1133 Mission
Oceanside, California
Old professor: My computer is so old! At least three people had it before me. Everything I write gets attributed to some secretary who left years ago. (pause) Maybe it's not a bad thing, considering the quality of what I write…
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: the IT guy
Sunday school teacher: How’s that new little kitten of yours?
Priest: She’s doing well. We’re taking her over to the vet tomorrow to be spayed.
Child #1: What’s spayed?
Child #2: That’s when they take off her overalls so she can’t have babies.
Joliet, Montana
Teacher: …yeah, they outnumber us thirty to one and we’re not allowed to carry stun guns.
6307 Orchard Beach Road
Cheboygan, Michigan
Professor: Girls, you have got to stop humping!
University of Arizona
Tucson, Arizona
Loud educator to others: Why does everything I touch get hard?
Doylestown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: G-wiz
Student teaching CPR: They're unconscious. They won't know what's going on, so it's all good.
Leesburg, Virginia
Student, while messing with professor's computer: How do you get your thing up?
Professor: What?
Mercer County Community College
West Windsor, New Jersey
Professor: People never say half the things they are supposed to have said. I mean, just ask Jesus — ‘It wasn’t me, it was my flippin’ disciples.’
Queens University
Kingston, Ontario
Canadia
Principal: I don’t want the upgrade if it means I have to learn something new. I don’t ever want to have to learn anything new.
1123 Broadway
New York, NY
