German teacher: Well, we’re going to have to relocate to another classroom for a while. It seems there’s a rat problem in this one.
Student: Are you going to gas them?
Glenunga International High School
Adelaide, South Australia
German teacher: Well, we’re going to have to relocate to another classroom for a while. It seems there’s a rat problem in this one.
Student: Are you going to gas them?
Glenunga International High School
Adelaide, South Australia
High school girl: I’m gonna name a cheese after you, Mr. L.*!
Mr. L.: If you actually had the power to do that, I’d be very flattered.
West Santa Clara Street
Arcadia, California
Overheard by: The Know It All
Teacher #1: I really need a video to show my kids after they finish their final. Do you have one I could borrow?
Teacher #2: Oh? Well, let’s see… What were you thinking about?
Teacher #1: Have anything with angsty kids? Oooh, especially angsty black kids? They love those.
Alabama
Overheard by: Saving the drama for my momma
Teacher: What’s one-fifth of 15?
Class, in unison: Five!
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: High school student, appalled
Teacher’s aide: Where did you find the sticky, gooey stuff (Tacky Finger)?
Secretary: In my drawers.
Contour Road
Gaithersburg, Maryland
History professor after a long explanation: But I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about, though.
University of Tulsa, 600 South College Avenue
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Male geology TA: So yeah, I had this student in lab today who asked me, ‘So, are these minerals… are these, like, things that can be found, like, out there…? Like, in the real world?’
Female grad student: What? Really?
Male geology TA: Yeah, it just blew his mind that this stuff actually existed in the real world.
Geoscience department, University of Iowa
Iowa City, Iowa
Overheard by: another grad student
Marketing professor: How many countries are in Africa? I’m going to go around the room, and each of you give me a number.
Student #1: 50?
Student #2: 62?
Student #3: 54?
Marketing professor to sorority girl: How many do you think?
Sorority girl: I thought Africa was a country.
Peoria, Illinois
Professor: It smells like fall, doesn’t it?
Student: It smells like depressing cold and the inevitable onset of winter.
Brandeis University
Waltham, Massachusetts
Overheard by: I didn’t smell anything
Economics professor: Kick me in the rear. I like it.
University of Ottawa
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: my attention span is price inelastic
