Female cubicle dweller on phone: Without those steroids, I'm not even functionable.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Functional Coworker
Female cubicle dweller on phone: Without those steroids, I'm not even functionable.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Functional Coworker
Manager #1: Shit! I can’t remember what I wanted to ask Al*…
Manager #2: If he’s gay? If he’s doing coke?
Circle Centre Mall
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Boss: Okay [Megan], you’re going to do all the work and I’m going to go get drunk.
Admin: Okay.
Boss: Oh, why was I born? I should’ve married rich.
Admin: Rich who?
99 Wall Street
New York, NY
Female intern: I’m not sorry.
Male worker: You should be. I missed my deadline.
Female intern: You missed your deadline because you are hungover, like, every day.
Male worker: Compounded by the fact I have to mentor skanks at work!
Rochelle Park, New Jersey
Overheard by: Blondie
Coworker #1: Did you watch The Office last night?
Coworker #2: Yeah, but I was pretty high, so I don’t remember if the parts that I thought were funny actually happened.
3rd Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: Bunny
Receptionist to office worker, carrying two bags of crushed Dr. Pepper cans: Oh my god! Are all those yours?
Office worker: Yep! Gotta hide the evidence of my addiction.
Receptionist: A Dr. Pepper addiction. I haven't seen one of those since I was a Mormon.
Santa Rosa, California
Manager: Would you like to buy a Lab?
Subordinate: Like, a meth lab?
Manager: Umm, no. Like, a dog.
Little Rock, Arkansas
Co-worker: I really wish they served beer in the vending machines…by the way, I’m not really an alcoholic, it’s just been one of those days… oh, by the way, you’re new, right? My name’s [Libby], nice to meet you!
300 South Main Street
Blacksburg, Virginia
Pharmacist #1: We really need to stop doping before work, because this just ain’t workin’.
Pharmacist #2: Yeah…
405 Heathrow Court
Burr Ridge, Illinois
Overheard by: The Zar
Employee #1: Sometimes I just get caught up in all this stuff, it’s so hectic.
Employee #2: You have to stop once in a while and find some sunshine.
Employee #1: I’d rather just find some moonshine.
50 West State Street
Trenton, New Jersey
Overheard by: Jimmy Fingers
