Female director to IT employee trying to figure out which thermostat to turn up: Just do whatever you have to to make me hot!
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Overheard by: r
Female director to IT employee trying to figure out which thermostat to turn up: Just do whatever you have to to make me hot!
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Overheard by: r
Boss: That guy was a stud. And he liked it. He enjoyed it. And I was in pain for days!
Louisiana
Overheard by: That's not right
Coworker: Derek’s* married? To a WOMAN?!
165 West 46th Street
New York, New York
Overheard by: Beth
Female employee, preparing for office happy hour: Do any of you have a bottle opener for the beer?
Male employee #1: He does.
Male employee #2: No, I don't.
Male employee #1: Yes you do, isn't there one on your belt buckle or key chain?
Male employee #2: Uhhh… No.
Male employee #1: Really? I'd swear that last time we did this, you took something out of your pants that did the job very well for her.
Kansas City, Missouri
Boss to underling: Let me pull my package back out so it is in front of me.
Black Diamond, Washington
VP: What's the name of the company I'm thinking of? We've got a job with them.
Engineer: Starts with…?
VP: A. A something. Aaaaaaa…
Engineer: Ass-fuckers anonymous?
VP, quietly: Ass-fuckers anonymous… Ass…
Engineer: Yeah, AFA, but trust me, it's not that. I just made that up.
VP, very loudly: Ass-fuckers anonymous!?
Engineer: Dude, can you not yell “ass-fuckers anonymous” when I'm in your office?
Paterson, New Jersey
PR guy to marketing guy: You know, I'm just going to massage it a little. I just want to get it into your hands as soon as possible, you know?
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: the girl who cannot hear
Manager giving out hot dogs at company picnic: Why don't you pry open your buns there so I can slide my meat in?
Milton Mall
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: amused worker
iPod chick #1: I told Lauren* to look hot today, we’ll see…
iPod chick #2: I know, it’s so hard for her. She can only look hot like once a month.
Waltham, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Joe
Engineer #1: What the hell were you thinking when you wrote this code?
Engineer #2: Boobs.
Engineer #1: Huh?!
Engineer #2: Truthfully, it’s likely I was thinking about boobs.
Columbia, Maryland
