Marketing Director: There’s one student there I’d love to get a photo of. She’s drop dead gorgeous and hardly ever wears clothes.
16340 North Scottsdale Road
Scottsdale, AZ
Marketing Director: There’s one student there I’d love to get a photo of. She’s drop dead gorgeous and hardly ever wears clothes.
16340 North Scottsdale Road
Scottsdale, AZ
Employer walking into the office: President Clinton is downstairs on Wacker Drive, but I think you girls will be safe if you just stay inside.
150 South Wacker Drive
Chicago, Illinois
Manager on phone: Yeah, I broke up with him…Yeah, he was okay…Yeah…Yeah…But he just didn’t scale.
Silicon Valley, California
Overheard by: David
Suit: Help desk? My computer went down on me.
Tech support: Please hold on. [Places suit on speaker phone] Can you repeat that?
Suit: My computer went down on me!
Tech support, with entire support team laughing in the background: So, what’s the problem?
3 2nd Street
Jersey City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer
Builder #1: Do we have a hole puncher?
Builder #2: Yeah, it’s over there near Diane’s* fat arse.
Builder #1: You can’t say that! That’s sexual harrassment! Diane, don’t worry, love. You’ve got a great arse.
Construction Site Office
Townsville, Australia
Overheard by: Naomi
Secretary: Put it in! Put it in! Faster, c’mon! I can’t take it, put it in! [Giggles]Worker: Ready? Here we go. [Excessive grunting]Secretary: Oh yeah, that feels great! Oh, yes.
Boss walks by. Looks in office.
Boss: What the hell is going on here?
Secretary: He just put the air conditioner in!
2000 Peel Street
Montreal, Quebec
Overheard by: Monika
Interviewer #1: You have had many jobs at that same company. Can you describe your work environment?
Forty-six-year-old proper woman: My company liked to move us around a lot so we got experience in different departments.
Interviewer #1: Was this a standard practice?
Woman: Oh, yes. They did that for everyone working at the restaurant’s HQ. Every six months we would move from department to department. We liked to call it “tossing the salad.”
Interviewer #1: Excuse me?
Interviewer #2: [Spits out his water.]Interviewers #3,4, and 5: [Look away and laugh uncontrollably]Woman: I got my salad tossed every six months, but in the past year moved it up to every three months. It’s all part of the manager training program.
Interviewer #6: Did you like getting your salad tossed?
Woman: Yes, I did.
Interviewer #6: It must take some getting used to. We have never tossed salads here, but that is not to say we won’t someday.
Woman: I would highly recommend it.
Church Street
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: PS
Coworker: It’s easy to determine who needs to take a sexual harassment class; just ask the person if “harass” is one word or two. If they say two, they need to take the class.
1200 Sovereign Row
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Overheard by: Not the guy who needs the class
Worker on phone: What time does she get in?…That’s kind of late. I’ll leave Lydia* with my mom, no reason to drag her all they way to the airport and back. Maybe we can find some place to have sex in the car on the way down there…Maybe I shouldn’t say stuff like that when I don’t have a ceiling or real walls.
333 Bush Street
San Francisco, California
Female: My nipples are boring.
Male: Does our insurance cover that?
5760 Highway 80
Pearl, Mississippi
Overheard by: Brain Dancing
