Purchaser on phone: No, no, the price is fine. I’m just a little concerned about the thickness of the shaft… How exactly is it lubricated? … Well, yeah, with that kind of thickness you are talking major lubrication…
Manufacturing company offices
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Salty
Client: I just want to touch a hundred and fifty people a day for three minutes.
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: 1 or 2 at a time?
Worker bee: How many more times are you going to touch those?
Parham Road
Richmond, Virginia
Account executive: Is child porn wrong if only children see it?
330 East Wacker Drive
Chicago, Illinois
Forklift driver: I need to reload this overweight [truck]. Do I need to unload the ass to put these two in the belly, or should I just throw them on?
Supervisor: Really, I would prefer them in the ass.
Iowa
Owner of company: That, coming out of a midget, would kick ass!
111 Oak Street
Bonner Springs, Kansas
Abs instructor pointing out muscle groups: That’s the great thing about being the instructor — you get to touch.
Army base
Iraq
Overheard by: The Touched
Attorney on phone: Yeah, I told my wife I’d be home late. We can get together for an hour or two. Can’t wait to feel you inside me.
Broad Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Nurse exiting patient’s room: I can’t find my vagina.
Princeton, New Jersey
Overheard by: chippy
Boss: I hate rubbing my hands on that while I’m banging away, so I cover all of the crevices with tape.
Portland, Oregon
