Dear Diary– Told Charlotte How I Feel Today!

Office chick #1: Hey, I like your shoes. Are they new?
Office chick #2: Thanks. I’ve had them for a while. I just haven’t been wearing them.
Office chick #1: They’re kind of low cut.
Office dude: Yeah, I can see a lot of arch. If this was the middle east, I’d totally be raping you right now.

Rancho Cordova, California

Overheard by: Good thing we’re in Cali.

Posted on April 17, 2022
California, Clothes, Compare and contrast, Compliments, Coworkers, Creepsters, Default, Employees, Places, Possible Sexual Harassment, Religion, Sexuality, Violence, Weirdness

But Could We Not Have This Conversation at the Urinal?

Boss: You like that little tool, don't you?
Worker: The keyboard? Yeah, it's great.

Uniontown, Ohio

Posted on April 15, 2022
Body Parts, Bosses and Underlings, Ohio, Possible Sexual Harassment, Questions

5PM That’s a Wrap

Office manager: Did you see that episode of South Park where they were talking about a camel toe?
Sales assistant: Ooh, lay off the camel toes! I have one. One of my toes is longer than the other and I hate wearing sandals.
[room bursts into snickers] Sales assistant: What?? Quit making fun of my toes!

8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina

Posted on April 5, 2022
Insults, Possible Sexual Harassment, Southeast

Though I’m Not Sure Why We Need Giant Paperclips

Female peon: Personally, I can handle four inches without a problem. Doesn’t bother me.

1250 Broadway
New York, New York

Posted on April 4, 2022
Employees, Gossip, New York, Possible Sexual Harassment

Relax and Try Not to Think about Jessica Simpson Any More

Cube monkey with web problems on phone to IT: Ugh, I can’t get it up. Get your ass over here — I can’t get it up!

Bristol
England

Overheard by: Mhlanguli

Posted on March 21, 2022
Dumb Employees, England, Offers and requests, Possible Sexual Harassment

12PM Lunch

Accountant: We’re taking Mark* to Joe’s Crab Shack for his retirement party at the end of the month.
Secretary: Is that where you want to go? I figured you for more of a Hooters man. Wouldn’t you rather have Hooters than crabs?
Mark: I thought the two went hand in hand! You can’t have one without the other.

401 Church Street
Nashville Tennessee

Posted on February 16, 2022
Coworkers, General Idiocy, Meals and Snacks, Possible Sexual Harassment, Receptionists, Tennessee

No, But Seriously, You’ve Gotta Clean Up That Blood

Teacher #1, to teacher #2: I like my vagina the way it is, I wouldn’t change a thing about it.

Aberfoyle Park High School, Taylors Road East
Aberfoyle Park, South Australia

Overheard by: Megan

Posted on January 27, 2022
Australia, Possible Sexual Harassment, School, Teachers

11AM To Hear Your Messages

Voicemail: Hello, this is Joe* from engineering, I’m having a problem with my computer, and was told you could help me out. It appears that there is a problem with my fixed dick…er, ficked disk, fisk dick.
[pause] FIXED DISK…..

4747 Harrison Avenue
Rockford, Illinois