Assistant: So how is your daughter?
Boss's wife: She's fine. She made honor roll. She's getting fat…
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Office Drone #3784
Assistant: So how is your daughter?
Boss's wife: She's fine. She made honor roll. She's getting fat…
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Office Drone #3784
Counselor: I'm sure he's a nice kid, but he looks like a beaver.
Decorah, Iowa
Overheard by: skm
Teen on cell: Well, you know … She just has that certain “jism” that is so attractive.
Omaha, Nebraska
Overheard by: You Mean Mojo
Boss: Dave*! You look like you've lost weight! Ever think about getting one of those HIV tests?
Calgary
Canadia
Expecting mom: Who wants to see pictures of my baby's abnormally large penis?
Green Bay, Wisconsin
Stunned server, after seeing shapely female exec chef in street clothes: Chef! You're a girl!
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: irrelevant
Mentor: You really shouldn't wear shorts to work.
Intern: I know, but I had to.
Mentor: Why?
Intern: It was raining.
Oil Company
Houston, Texas
Girl #1: I hate our supervisor and her stupid flicky long hair.
Girl #2: I just want to go up to her and just cut her hair off.
Guy: I just want to cut her throat.
Girl #1: I would love to do that, but it's illegal.
Guy: So would cutting her hair, unless you were her hairdresser.
Girl #2: I can just see it now?
Guy: When you go to court?
Girl: When I cut her hair, I was actually aiming for her throat, for this, your honor, I am…
Together: Extremely sorry.
Sydney
Australia
Sassy black sales rep: There is nothing attractive about Larry King!
Charlotte, North Carolina
Cube mate #1: Get some rest tonight. We have to look good in front of the boss at the charity bowl-a-thon tomorrow.
Cube mate #2: Are you bringing your balls?
Sugar Land, Texas
