Coworker: Yes, I ordered Italian ice from your menu…Oh, so you don’t have any more Italian ice. Hmmm, what else would I like?…Oh, you don’t have Italian ice, but you have iced tea?…um, what?
1251 Avenue of the Americas
New York, NY
Coworker: Yes, I ordered Italian ice from your menu…Oh, so you don’t have any more Italian ice. Hmmm, what else would I like?…Oh, you don’t have Italian ice, but you have iced tea?…um, what?
1251 Avenue of the Americas
New York, NY
Portly woman #1: You want half? It's thick, seriously… I can't finish that off.
Portly woman #2: I don't know if I'm up for that kinda mouthful today.
Delran, New Jersey
Overheard by: Bruce Banner
Co-worker #1: Hey, what are you doing?
Co-worker #2: Nothing.
Co-worker #1: What time are you going to lunch?
Co-worker #2: I was gonna go in a little bit.
Co-worker #1: Know what? I was too. C’mon, let’s go take a pee, then we’ll go to lunch.
1450 Chapel Street
New Haven, Connecticut
Male custodian: Aw jeez, I just dropped my nuts on the floor.
Female custodian: Oh my goodness, look at the mess you've made!
Wisconsin
Overheard by: I Giggled
Boss: There’s pizza in the back room for everyone in appreciation of your hard work!
Employee #1: Hey, Jen*, can you save me a slice? I can’t leave my desk right now.
Employee #2: Sure, I’ll bring two back. There should be enough for two slices per person.
Employee #3: You know, I work harder than the rest of you all combined; therefore, I should get the most fuckin’ pizza. Does anyone else here work as hard as me? I don’t fuckin’ think so. So that means that I get more pizza. I don’t want to see anyone eating more fuckin’ pizza than me.
Employee #2: So, Meredith*, what kind of pizza did you want?
Employee #1: Um, I think I’ll just… stick with my yogurt… Thanks.
570 Worcester Road
Framingham, Massachusetts
Manager to coworker in next office: Why does it smell like rotten meat in here?
Coworker: Oh, sorry. I'll put my shoes back on.
Chicago, Illinois
Boss: I need to leave work before I get too drunk!
1819 Peachtree Road
Atlanta, Georgia
Employee: Oh, I’ve had their Mandarin Chicken Salad, but I didn’t like it. Then again, I don’t like Mandarins.
711 Third Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: Lolito
Co-worker on phone: Well, when I asked you over for lunch I asked if there was something you didn’t eat besides cheese…Well I’m just saying you should have told me you didn’t eat pork when I asked…Yes, I know you’re Jewish…Well whatever you are, you’re an idiot and a liar. You should have told me about the pork…Ew, she’s your first cousin.
622 3rd Avenue
New York, NY
Employee #1: I love Chex Mix so much I'd grind it up, stick it in an IV and mainline it.
Employee #2: I…well… (pauses in thought) You couldn't *freebase* it…
Mesa, Arizona
Overheard by: Chris Cardinal
