Things Heat Up a Couple of Degrees in Wisconsin, Then Cool Off

Copywriter: So David*, did you thank your wife for the candy she gave you yesterday?
David: In more ways than one.
Proofreader: A simple “yes” would have been sufficient.

Wausau, Wisconsin

Overheard by: Why am I the one blushing?

Posted on January 31, 2021
Compare and contrast, Default, Meals and Snacks, Questions, Teachers, Wisconsin, Words, Writers and Editors

Some Undercover DEA Agents Aren't Very Subtle

Employee to another, arranging pretzels on display: You know, you're supposed to hang these straight, but if you hang them crooked they are more tantalizing….tantalizing like crack.

Birmingham, Alabama

Posted on January 26, 2021
Alabama, Compare and contrast, Employees, Meals and Snacks, Substance Use & Abuse

What’s It Gonna Take to Get Me Out of This Conversation?

Girl: Yeah, he thought you meant that I was gonna make cheese from my breast milk, you know, to save money…
Boss: That’s not what I meant.
Girl: I know!

Texas

Overheard by: the lowly receptionist

Posted on January 23, 2021
Bosses and Underlings, Meals and Snacks, Texas

I Nodded Off During the Part About the Rain Forests

Gay drama teacher: We’re going to McDonald’s, did you want us to pick something up for you?
Hippie guitar teacher: No, I don’t eat there.
Gay drama teacher: Why, because of the movie Supersize Me?
Hippie guitar teacher: No, I stopped eating there ever since they started cutting down the rain forests to make room for more cow pastures for their meat.
Gay drama teacher: So… then, you don’t want McDonalds?

1311 E Katella Ave
Orange, California

Posted on January 21, 2021
California, General Idiocy, Meals and Snacks, School, Teachers

I’m a Married Man

Female clerk: Did you eat yet?
Male clerk: Yeah, I’ve been here since 1:30.
Female clerk: Ooh! Then can I lint-brush you?

Convenience Store
Brighton, Massachusetts

Posted on December 30, 2020
Clothes, Coworkers, Crazies, Default, Employees, Health & Hygiene, Massachusetts, Meals and Snacks, Offers and requests, Places, Possible Sexual Harassment, Retail, Weirdness, Wishes

Charging Extra for Stupidity Could Turn the Country’s Finances Around in a Year or Two

Intercom: Welcome to Popeye’s. Can I take your order?
Woman: Yes, I’d like a Number 2 with a Sprite, please.
Intercom: That will be $8.43… mild or spicy?
Woman: Yes.
Intercom: Mild or spicy?
Woman: Yes, please.
Intercom: [laughter]Woman: What? What?
Intercom: That will be $41.23.

Popeye’s
Waldorf, Maryland