Gentleman fundraiser, waving hands: I can't be trusted with eggs!
Seneca Place
Ithaca, New York
Gentleman fundraiser, waving hands: I can't be trusted with eggs!
Seneca Place
Ithaca, New York
Blonde Asian: Dude, whole cashews taste way better than half cashews.
Sunburnt Mexican: I totally agree…I can't believe we're having this conversation right now.
El Camino Real
Carlsbad, California
Overheard by: nadia
Sloth on phone: I agree we need to go grocery shopping before we go camping. (pause) No, don't bother to buy that much corn on the cob because my boyfriend won't eat it. (pause) Why? The truth is he doesn't like to see it in his poo when he looks back and flushes.
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: My Ipod just isn't loud enough
Office lady #1: At the bar my sister works at, they put jello shots in a syringe so you can just squeeze it back.
Office lady #2: Oh no, I like to feel it all over.
Pearl Street
Austin, Texas
Intern #1: Paul, are you chewing on a battery?
Intern #2: Yeah, it's fun. I'm bored and it shocks me.
Washington, DC
(fart noise, then microwave door closes and microwave starts, then a ding!)
Temp kid: Dude, what did he just microwave?
Northern Virginia
Overheard by: Mika
Customer at deli: There's not enough holes in that Swiss cheese. That's no good. There's supposed to be more holes. I don't know whether to get a quarter pound or a half. Let me taste it…alright, give me a little more than a quarter pound…that's too much!
Third Avenue
Manhattan, New York
Him: You take croissant dough, roll it out, fill it with fajita meat, onions, peppers… Cover it with cheese, roll it up them, and put more cheese on it.
Her: That's called a “stromboli.”
Him: No it's not. It's a Bradley special. It's what I always give out on the third date.
Glenview
San Antonio, Texas
Office bimbo #1, at an office potluck: Well, I knew she would like my buns better than John's. His buns are all squishy and white, mine have seeds and nuts in them.
Office bimbo #2: Well, I am glad she just kept her hands off of my buns.
Albuquerque, New Mexico
Overheard by: Monitor of the Bore-atorium
Cube dweller #1: Aw, man, you totally stole my favorite bowl! And I got that from the third floor kitchen and everything. Now I'll have to go all the way down there get a new one.
Cube dweller #2: Make sure there's enough room for your tears.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
