Will You Wear Your Corset and Shiny Black Boots Again?

HR woman on phone with rep at staffing agency: I will drive over there and I will smack you; and then I will fire you in front of your peers.

Marlborough, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Anony Mouse

Posted on December 27, 2019
Employees, Hiring & Firing, Human Resources, Massachusetts, On the phone, Threats, Violence

That's Hot, Bob

Marketing manager: I love me some cock sauce!

New England Executive Park
Burlington, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Skipping The Salad Bar Today

Posted on November 17, 2019
Admins, Body Parts, Feelings, Massachusetts, Meals and Snacks, Weirdness, Words

And Just Like That, Alan’s Frame of Reference Exploded

Interviewer: So, I see from your resume that you spent two years in Africa with the Peace Corps.
Interviewee: Yes.
Interviewer: Did you work with any minorities there?

Worcester, Massachusetts

Overheard by: I was the minority

Posted on November 11, 2019
General Idiocy, Geography & History, Hiring & Firing, Interviewers/Interviewees, Massachusetts, Race

After the Fourth or Fifth Time, It Starts to Get Redundant

Front desk guy at staff meeting: Ah, yes… I'll shoot that one out to all of you by Friday.
Male office director: Oh, Michael, I love it when you talk dirty!
Female secretary: Erm… I'm not putting that in the minutes.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: taking notes

Posted on November 3, 2019
Admins, Bosses, Compliments, Coworkers, Massachusetts, Meetings, Weirdness, Words

The Meteorologist Said It’d Be Fabulous

Office chick #1: Have you seen the weather today?
Office chick #2: 100% chance of gayness today.

Burlington, Massachusetts

Overheard by: tater

Posted on October 11, 2019
Coworkers, Default, Massachusetts, Questions, Sexuality, Weather

Now If Only We Could Figure Out a Way to Blame This on Men…

Person #1: My vagina is as fucked as the Gaza strip.
Person #2: Can I suggest a nice Jewish gyno?
Person #1: I don't want her to colonize my vag. Monistat will work just fine.
Person #2: You could just shove some Challah bread up there and have the yeast go to town on your sorry ghettoized crotch.

Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on August 12, 2019
Body Parts, Compare and contrast, Friends, Health & Hygiene, Massachusetts, Weirdness, Wishes

See, This Is Why They Pay Me the Big Bucks.

Boss, discussing chances of gaining a particular client: There's a 100% chance, it's 50/50.

Financial District
Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on June 26, 2019
Bosses, General Idiocy, Massachusetts, Science

Defined My Terms Nicely

Female coworker: I hope he doesn’t mind that I wrote my report in eyeliner.

Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on June 26, 2019
Dumb Employees, General Idiocy, Massachusetts

Hey, I Know Where It’s Been

Temp girl: You’ll go on a date and sleep with random guys, but you won’t touch my nose?!

Watertown, Massachusetts

Overheard by: disgruntled

Posted on June 9, 2019
Gripes, Interns & Temps, Massachusetts

That Just Means You're Not Doing It Right.

Older female employee: I can't get on my knees. I have bad arthritis so there's no way I'm going down.
Younger female employee: I'll do it. Move over.
Older female employee: I'm going to the other one. Every time I use this one, it breaks.

Marlborough, Massachusetts

Posted on May 26, 2019
Coworkers, General Idiocy, Health & Hygiene, Massachusetts