Woman on phone with client: Let me put this to you another way: you pay for four hours with a whore. You buy her a catsuit. At the end of that time, you don't own the whore. You may still retain the catsuit but what good will that do you, since you're a 45-year-old balding fat guy? You might as well leave the catsuit with the whore.
Defense Contractor
Andover, Massachusetts
Producer: Hey Nick, let’s hook this up ASPA.
355 W. 52nd Street
New York, NY
Employee: My headset for my phone doesn’t work. Can I have a new one?
Supervisor: Let me see that. Oh…you see what’s wrong? Sometimes the data can get caught in the phone line…so just straighten the cord. That makes the voice data come through more quickly and it won’t get all caught up.
11161 Mill Valley Road
Omaha, Nebraska
Co-worker: She said I was giving her an ulcer…But I don’t even have ulcers!
1127 Euclid Avenue
Cleveland, Ohio
Dude: Why you goin’ to a tupperware party? You’re a grown-ass man, dawg!
10 Coventry Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: supremo
Office grunt #1: Hey! So, you’re back in the office, eh? Where were you last week?
Office grunt #2: Oh, I was in Guatemala.
Office grunt #1: Really? In Europe?
Office grunt #2: No.
Ottawa, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Anonymous
Woman on bus: You've gotta be careful in life and not let your mishaps turn into haps!
Jersey City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Evan
Employee #1: So, if it’s 7:11 now, and I have a 30 minute break, what time do I have to be back?
Employee #2: Uh, 7:41.
Employee #1: How did you figure that out so fast?
Huron Road
Cleveland, Ohio
Engineer: Don’t kill anyone.
Tech Writer: Can I maim them?
Engineer: Yeah. If you maim them you seem like more of a team player.
1550 Buckeye Drive
Milpitas, California
Paralegal: Well, Montreal is technically in America.
Design Center Place
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: umm … really?
