Feelings

Old Chinese tech: Hey, you know a' Tiger Woods?
Male phone tech: Yes! We dated! He said he loved me!
Old Chinese tech: You a'mysterious numbah fourteen!

Malvern, Pennsylvania

[In the ER.]Nurse #1: Oh my god.
Nurse #2: What?
Nurse #1, looking horrified: I just entered all of these notes on the wrong patient’s file.
Nurse #2: It’s okay. Just go back, delete, and re-enter them for the right patient.
Nurse #1, distressed at herself: But that’s awful! What would have happened?
Nurse #2, shrugging: ‘s’okay, happens all the time.

Hospital
Beckley, West Virginia

Coworker#1: Okay, I’m back.
Coworker#2: Where did you go?
Coworker#3: We went to get a slushie.
Coworker#2: What? Where’s mine?
Coworker#1: You didn’t say you wanted one.
Coworker#2: Well, must my slushie needs be known to everyone? I just can’t believe you went without even asking me.
Coworker#3: How is she supposed to know if you wanted a slushie?
Coworker#2: I always ask her if she wants one when I go. I even give her money if she wants one. Oh, and look now. Now your’re drinking it in front of me.
Coworker #1: Dude! You never said you wanted one. You even saw me walk out. Do you even want one?
Coworker# 2: No, I’m fine.

19219 N 4th Street
Covington, Louisiana

Woman on phone: I thought that once my father died, my mom would be happy. But that was 25 years ago, and she's still miserable.

Huntington, New York

Female coworker holding wooden box: My box smells a lot like smoked fish.

Parnell
Auckland
New Zealand

Overheard by: Gus

Project manager: Dick is a great guy.
Deputy project manager: Yeah, I love Dick.

College Park, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Kevin

Suit in bathroom: Don’t you hate it when the hole in your underwear is in the wrong spot?

Cottage Grove
Wisconsin

Overheard by: um.. yah

Young guy to girl: I see you everyday and I'm completely unaffected.

Valparaiso, Indiana

Overheard by: jake

Factory worker: It’s great, you know. I can go to my doctor and say stuff like: “This stuff is green, and it’s making me sick.”

Kelso Drive
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: Anonymous Temp

Woman on intercom: David*, to the back office. David*, to the back office, please.
David*on intercom: No, I don't want to. No, I don't want to.

Kinko's
San Antonio, Texas

Overheard by: The Flying Aspidistra