Cashier, ringing up case of beer and large box of condoms: Got a busy weekend planned, huh?
Customer: Yeah, my sister's coming into town tonight. Gotta be prepared, you know?
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Lusus Naturae
Cashier, ringing up case of beer and large box of condoms: Got a busy weekend planned, huh?
Customer: Yeah, my sister's coming into town tonight. Gotta be prepared, you know?
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Lusus Naturae
Office troubleshooter on phone: We're going to have to put pantyhose on the monster, because we need control.
http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2008/09/gentlemen-prefer-hanes.html
Overheard by: lauraf
Boss on phone: What do you mean she's canceling the meeting? (pause) Delayed? Why? (pause) She has breast cancer? That's great! (pause) Oh no! I must have cut out, I said “that's a great tragedy.” (pause) Well, that must be awful. (pause) I see, well, send her my best. (pause) Thank you, bye now. (to entire office) Cancer just saved my ass! Who wants to go for drinks?
Chinatown
Manhattan, New York
Sales VP to shipping clerk: This is a very important sales proposal for UPS to consider. I want it in their hands first thing tomorrow morning, so be sure to FedEx it right away.
Shipping clerk: Okaaaaay…
Baltimore, Maryland
Food service worker: And he was all reaching for them, like, “can I touch them?”
Maintenance worker: What?
Food service worker: Yeah! And I said, “no, you cannot touch them. Where I'm raised, you don't just go touch them.”
Maintenance worker: Yeah, you can't just reach out and grab them.
Food service worker: No! Well, he didn't speak much English, but I think he got the point.
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: Trying not to smile
Woman in hardware store, holding tube of black caulk: Does this caulk come in a smaller size?
Helpful hardware dude: No ma'm, black caulk only comes in large sizes.
Hardware Store
San Antonio, Texas
Overheard by: of course it does…..
Employee #1, trying to put flash drive in front USB port: It won't fit.
Employee #2: That's what she said.
Employee #1: Seriously, it's too big!
Employee #2: That's what she said!
Employee #3: Well, try it in the back.
Employee #2: That's what she said!
Employee #1: It's in!
Employee #2: That's what she said!
Employees #1 & #3: Shut up, Dave*!
Port Orchard, Washington
Woman in office to client that is leaving: Just so you know, I just poured some tuna fish water in the toilet, but I didn't use it. You know, just in case you were thinking… You know…
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Mickey
Man, complaining in office: That's not my package. That package is only 1 pound. My package weighs 42 pounds!
Northern New Jersey
Overheard by: Ride that donkey
Irate cafeteria worker to 14-year-old daughter, over phone: I will fight you like I'd fight an enemy in the street.
Garden City, New York
Overheard by: emma pilsbury
