Disgruntled teacher: Well, we need advance notice when the file server's going to be down, especially when we work on final exams and stuff.
Principal: Duly noted.
Tall teacher: And ignored.
Hancock, New York
Disgruntled teacher: Well, we need advance notice when the file server's going to be down, especially when we work on final exams and stuff.
Principal: Duly noted.
Tall teacher: And ignored.
Hancock, New York
Real estate agent #1: My son is teaching himself how to play guitar! He's getting real good!
Real estate agent #2: That's great! What's he using?
Real estate agent #1: This program called Guitar Hero.
Morris Plains, New Jersey
Overheard by: JMB
Coworker #1: Our annual report is going to be delivered today. Please let me know when it arrives.
Coworker #2: How often do we get that?
University of Michigan, Ann Arbor
Teacher: My birthday is tomorrow. I can't believe I'm going to be 35!
Student teacher: I'm only 23.
Teacher: When I was 23, I was going to chapel at university while smoking pot!
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Overheard by: Really??
CSR to coworker: I don't really understand sororities. I've always been able to make friends, get drunk and have random sex without having to pay dues.
Nashville, Tennessee
Boss: So what school did you go to again?
Worker: The University of Illinois.
Boss: Right…that's an Ivy League school, right?
Worker: (stunned silence)
Boston, Massachusetts
Customer: I need to get a dozen and a half, mixed.
Clerk, counting on her day-glo orange fingernails: It’d be cheaper if you got 18.
Customer: What’s the difference?
Clerk: ten cents.
Smirking customer: Ok, I’ll take 18.
Dunkin’ Donuts
Columbia, South Carolina
Overheard by: are u kidding me?
Male visitor: I am here because of a class that I missed due to my court case. She (points to professor) told me I could get credit if I showed her my subpoenas.
Campbell University
North Carolina
Deskie #1: What’s that smell? Sulfur? Rotten eggs?
Deskie #2: I have it figured out: It’s Halloween, and all these girls are walking around with nothing covering areas which haven’t been exposed in public since last Halloween.
Deskie #1: I don’t get why that is relevant.
Front desk, Central Michigan University
Mount Pleasant, Michigan
Overheard by: Not A Deskie
