Tech: Okay, now right-click there.
Admin: Here?
Tech: No, right-click. Right there.
Admin: Okay…
Tech: No, get rid of that. Right-click. Right there. Right-click. Right-click…Which button are you clicking?
Admin: The left one.
Texas A&M University
College Station, Texas
Female coworker: Can you lend me a screwdriver so I can put this hook on the door?
IT dude: Do you know what you're doing with that?
Female coworker: Are you kidding? I've got a degree in screwing!
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Steph
Executive assistant on phone: You know, I don't want to sound mean, but something I've noticed is: all the students who have (pause) problems… all take psychology courses! Why do you think that is? Maybe they're just trying to “figure it all out”?
Jesuit University
Maryland
Overheard by: Admin
University maintenance worker, over walkie-talkie: I was just talking with Lisa, and she says she has like a weird smell in her room. So I was gonna ask if you could come over here and help me smell it.
Hawaii
Overheard by: It takes two people?
Receptionist, on his last day: How can I give the rest of the staff access to these files?
Tech guy: Put them on the network.
Receptionist: Where’s the network?
Tech guy: Exactly! It’s everywhere, man!
University of Minnesota, Minneapolis
Overheard by: I’m New Here
Boss: So, what do you like about working here?
Employee: Well, I really like that working here, you have your hands on the pulse of campus.
Boss: I'm sorry, did you say “the balls of campus”?
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Overheard by: Didshereallythinkshesaidthat?
Server manager: Sheffield Hallam… Is that a Poly University?
Web marketer: Dunno, ask the Googleverse.
Server manager, darkly: I will ask the Googleverse.
Dotcom Company
England
Overheard by: Tim C
Coworker in break room: She said it was in college and she was drunk. I don't care how drunk you are, you don't poop on a pillow.
Rocky Hill, Connecticut
Older male student records assistant on phone: Does the word “Firefox” mean anything to you?
Walnut Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
FBI agent: Excuse me, I’m an investigator for the FBI. I would like a copy of a student’s transcript.
Registrar: Ok. You need to pay a $7 transcript fee.
FBI agent: Uh. I don’t think I need to pay that. I’m an investigator for the FBI.
Registrar: Everybody has to pay for a transcript.
FBI agent: I think I will have to speak to your supervisor.
Registrar: I’m sorry, but that’s what the sign says.
John Jay College of Criminal Justice, 10th Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: Waiting next in line
