Office worker: After my father died I needed something to fill my head, so I thought “Oh! Celebrity doll collecting!”
Beacon Street
Newton, Massachusetts
Office worker: After my father died I needed something to fill my head, so I thought “Oh! Celebrity doll collecting!”
Beacon Street
Newton, Massachusetts
Cute producer girl to smoking hot anchorwoman: Speaking of awesome, my ass hurts.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: WebHag
Male coworker #1: I don't care how much of a bitch she is, her tits are unbelievable.
Male coworker #2: Shit, did you see that red thing she was wearing yesterday? I had to jerk off in the bathroom during lunch.
Female coworker they're talking about: You guys are aware that I can hear you, right?
Male coworker #1: In our own defense, we weren't aware of that.
Chelmsford, Massachusetts
Overheard by:
(male admin yawns)
Female admin: Nap time?
Male admin: I never sleep.
Female admin: You never sleep? What, do you put toothpicks in your eyes to keep them open?
Male admin: I'm going to write that down, that's a good idea.
Female admin: At least you choose to stay awake, rather than your husband waking you up by coming home at 1:30 in the morning.
Male admin: At least he didn't pee in the bed.
New York City, New York
Boss: Someone submitted an underage Nazi girls site to our search engine? Are you fucking kidding me? As a Jew and a pornographer, this offends me on so many levels.
Virginia Ave
Seattle, Washington
White office dude: What do a roll of sod and a 200-pound white chick have in common?
Mexican office dude: I dunno. What?
White office dude: Sooner or later they both get laid by a Mexican.
Mexican office dude: You know, that joke would be really funny if it weren't so true.
Employee Parking Garage
Downers Grove, Illinois
Office worker: Okay, who started the cookie rumor? I have 45 people coming to my desk asking me for some cookies that I made!
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: maryk
Female estimator: My boss is going to deep dive me on this tomorrow. He knows where all my holes are.
Everett, Washington
Female coworker: You're my best friend and I love you and all but I just really don't want to Wikipedia Greek porn with you ever again.
Male coworker: It's not porn, it's art! They're etchings.
Female coworker: Whatever. Ewwww.
Male coworker: Seriously. Wow. Ewww. (looks around room) Ummm, yeah, I think I need to go cry in the executive shower.
McKemmy
Chandler, Arizona
Female Facebook coworker: My old professor just Facebooked me.
Male non-Facebook coworker: That sounds wrong. Is that like a dirty Sancho or something?
Female Facebook coworker: It's Sanchez. And no.
Wacker Drive
Chicago Illinois
Overheard by: Hear No Evil
