Serious coworker: Wait… quinoa has poop in it?
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: McNasty
Wholesale meat salesman to customer on phone: We've got 12-inch weiners on special.
Ashville, New York
Cube girl on phone: And I’m having a really bad day. I just licked an interoffice envelope.
New York, New York
Desk monkey #1: I heard she and her boyfriend had Brazilian waxes done together. The man’s treatment is called the ‘free willy wax.’
Desk monkey #2: Oooh! Can you do that? I mean, you can’t wax a man’s balls!
Overheard by: Ouch!
Customer: It has been freezing on me while I use it. I tried to check for viruses but I don't have those privileges.
Tech support: I checked and it doesn't have any viruses. Is it still freezing now?
Doctor: "cervical cancer gets attention, but there are no runs for anal cancer."
Overheard by: freudian flip
Data manager to minion: Body parts aren’t nearly as uncomfortable as homicide.
New York City, New York
Overheard by: AureateCalyx
Male grunt: If my mouse stops working, I’m going to go home.
Female grunt: Well, did you try jiggling it?
Male grunt: Yeah, I jiggled the shit out of it. [Female grunt giggles.]
Voice from cubicle #1: Man, it sucks, having to wear a respirator.
Voice from cubicle #2: How am I going to drink coffee through this thing?
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Lifeblack