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Supervisor: What happened to that book you were reading?
Dreadlocked girl: “How to Act Like an Adult”?
Supervisor: Yeah!
Dreadlocked girl: I lost it.

Ann Arbor, Michigan

Cube dweller #1: She looks like the bride of Frankenstein.
Cube dweller #2: Who’s Brian Frankenstein?

Chesapeake, Virginia

Overheard by: head:desk

Kitchen grunt: You ever poop and suddenly find the world a better place?

Main Street
Greenwood, Indiana

Overheard by: RDC

Looks Like Bill's Work, to Me

Graphic designer looking at logo: Looks like a free hand job to me.

England

Overheard by: Johnny Bystander

Annoyed agent in cubicle: He sounds like a bad Yoda who can't speak English!

Vermillion, South Dakota

Overheard by: AKAFaviloa123

Constantly disgruntled librarian: So she was driving me so batshit crazy with her stupid stupid questions that I wanted to punch her right in her stupid stupid face. But then I thought that anyone who's that chronically stupid must already have a really difficult life. So my good deed for the day was to just punch her in my imagination.
Calmer librarian: You truly are a prince among men.
Constantly disgruntled librarian: I know, right? Most people don't get that about me.

London
England

Overheard by: PunkRockLibrarian

Man walking into restroom: Man, it smells like a toilet in here!

Camarillo, California

Office lady: How can you drink that much Red Bull?
Computer nerd: I don’t know, you build up a tolerance.
Office lady: If I drank that much I’d be whacking off the walls.
Computer nerd: Umm, you’d do what?

117th St
Broomfield, Colorado

Overheard by: The other nerd

Cube rat #1: My mouse is being such a pain lately.
Cube rat #2: You should get one of those mouses that, y’know, doesn’t have a cord. Oh, man, what are those called, again?
Cube rat #1: Um, a cordless mouse?

Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: I work with monkeys

Man: *Erica, the phone’s for you.
Old coworker: What?
Man: It’s for *Erica!
Old man: Oh, ok. [picks up the phone] Hello?… Oh, hold on. [puts phone down] *Erica, the phone’s for you!

Washington Navy Yard
Washington, DC