Black salesman: How do you know about that part of town?
White manager: Coz that’s where the bitches is at!
Kelso Drive
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Anonymous Temp
Black salesman: How do you know about that part of town?
White manager: Coz that’s where the bitches is at!
Kelso Drive
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Anonymous Temp
Salesman: That man was crazy!
Architect: Was he gay?
Salesman: No, he’s too old to be gay!
Williamsburg, Virginia
Overheard by: Not too old
Young guy in office to crowd: Yeah, I spent all of last summer visiting Holland.
Only girl in office: Really? Oh my god, how was the fourth of July over there?
Guy and office: [silence].
18th Street
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Quiet Chuckler
Female staff: Oh man, I’m so into “America’s Next Top Model.” You know that show.
Male staff: Oh yes. Good quality programming.
Female staff: They were having this marathon on VH1 this weekend, like the whole last season all at once. I got so hooked. But I missed the last two or three episodes, so I don’t know who won it.
Male staff: That’s awful. You really don’t know? That was last season.
Female staff: No, I didn’t see the last few episodes.
Male staff: You mean to tell me that you don’t know who won last season’s “America’s Next Top Model”?
Female staff: I didn’t see the last episode?
Male staff: But you don’t recognize her from all of the glamorous advertisements and runway shows she’s been doing?
Female staff: Well, no, I… Oh. You’re being sarcastic.
Male staff: For minutes now.
10 Medical Center Boulevard
Winston-Salem, North Carolina
Accounting peon #1: This pen leaks. I look like I killed a smurf with my bare hands.
Accounting peon #2: Which smurf?
Accounting peon #1: Jokey.
Accounting peon #2: Nice.
Westridge
Watsonville, California
Overheard by: Happens to me too.
Worker bee #1: Hey, did you notice Claire* doesn’t wear that green suit thing anymore?
Worker bee #2: No, I think she realized people were calling her Shrek.
Worker bee #1: [after a pause.] yeah… Yeah I can see that actually.
Civic Drive
Greensborough
Australia
Overheard by: it’s so true
Customer service rep to customer service rep: Dude, I totally fell asleep in the middle of that last call. The lady was like, uh, hello? I said, uh, yeah, sorry about that. My computer’s really slow.
Elevator
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: I can’t believe I work here…
Co-worker to boss: You wanna hear how self-centered I am?
Boss: Please!
Los Angeles, California
Nurse, screening for life insurance: So tell me about your siblings…
Male worker: Well, I have 3 sisters, two older and one who’s a twin. I’m the youngest by two minutes.
Nurse: Oh, really? You have a twin sister? Are you identical?
Male worker: Are you serious? You’re a professional nurse and you’re asking me if I’m identical to my twin sister? Is this screening over because I’ve got work to do.
Tacoma, Washington
Overheard by: Stan Green
Man: Is Murphy* a man? Or a woman?
Woman: Does it matter?
Man: Um yeah. I was going to ask Terry out, and the shape of his? Her? Genitals rather matters to me.
Woman: Bigot.
Church in Victoria
British Columbia
Canadia
