Office guy: Woo-hoo! One less child!
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: usual suspect
Female coworker to copy machine: You have enough paper, you bitch.
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: The New Guy
Elderly office assistant to youthful graphic designer: I have to tell you about cabbage, and how nutritious cabbage is…
Water Street
New York City, New York
Coworker #1: Right?
Coworker #2: Right! [Pause.] What did I just agree to?
Coworker #3: We’re blaming the Jews for traffic congestion.
West 57th Street
New York City, New York
IT guy to IT manager: Nice shoes, are they new?
IT manager: Yeah, but they’re too clean and white. They need to be scuffed up more.
IT guy: You know what they should do? They should make the seven-year old Taiwanese kids who sew these wear them for a few days first.
IT manager: Yeah, that’s perfect. Pre-scuffed shoes. They’d be flopping around in shoes way too big, but at least they’d have shoes for a few days.
Good Hope Road
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
DBA to male co-worker: I want service! I’m coming to you to be serviced!
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: I thought that belonged in the men’s room…
Office vet #1: Lisa* was showing me how to use chopsticks at lunch today, you know, cause she’s Asian.
Office vet #2: Lisa*?
Office vet #1: You know, the girl we work with in third party…I don’t know what kind of Asian she is, apparently there’s different kinds, you know…
St. Paul Plaza
Baltimore, Maryland
CSR #1: So, no one was murdered yesterday?
CSR #2: Yeah, I guess it was a good day.
CSR #1: Depends on your point of view.
CS supervisor: I’m leaving.
Staples Drive
Framingham, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Heater
Internet sweatshop girl: Its getting cold in here!
Internet sweatshop guy: Does it make you want to put on all of your clothes?
Hell’s Kitchen
New York City, New York
Coworker: With as much time as we spend pulling stuff out of our ass around here, it’s amazing they even give us chairs.
Fort Worth, Texas
