Weirdness

(young executive is talking about a presentation (aka deck) he sent to the director)
Director: You know, it just got me so excited to see a deck like that. I'm so glad. The deck actually got me almost over-excited. Now I'm going to be playing around with this deck all night.
Exec: Uh huh.
Director: It's just so stimulating .
Exec: Uh huh.
Director: I'm just fascinated by decks like that. I feel very over-excited about it.
Exec: Uh huh.
(pause)
Director: Oh, you must be getting really overheated. I should let you go. Have a good trip. I'll be thinking about your deck until you come back.

K Street
Washington, DC

CFO to staff: You are the tools who get things done…

Raleigh Road
Raleigh, North Carolina

Overheard by: tool

Sales to admin: Two rimmers and an in-and-out. That sounds like a good Friday night!

Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: Elizabeth

Office girl: Why don't you get a baby? A cute little brown baby?
Gay office worker: I don't want a gay-by!
Office girl: Oh yeah, a cute little chocolate baby!
Gay office worker: I'd eat him! I love chocolate! (pause) Anyway where's my urn?

Manhattan, New York

Girl to friend: We should just spray them all with meat and unleash ravenous carnivores.

Reno, Nevada

Man to woman, entering elevator: The best thing about Sydney is that you can go either way, male or female.

Cambridge, Massachusetts

Secretary: That’s what my sister did. They went to Niagara Falls and got married by a midget.

Uniontown, Ohio

Program manager: What about follow-on funding?
Scientist: Well, in my ideal world, we'd get the follow-on, and then I wouldn't have to do anything but sit in team meetings and spew hatred.

Ypsilanti, Michigan

Bank teller to customer at drive-through: Sorry, I can't wait on you. I must go home, I've messed myself.

Madisonville, Kentucky

Old lady to young guy cleaning fish tank: I remember when cell phones were the size of a barn.

Doctor's Waiting Room
Burbank, California