Boss on phone: I’m the entrepreneur type — I shoot from the hip. I figure I’ll fix it when I’m finished messing it up.
Hayward Avenue
Carteret, New Jersey
Overheard by: Jay-B
Boss on phone: I’m the entrepreneur type — I shoot from the hip. I figure I’ll fix it when I’m finished messing it up.
Hayward Avenue
Carteret, New Jersey
Overheard by: Jay-B
Office mate: Someday I'm going to have to crawl under my desk and pick up my husband…
Memphis, Tennessee
Overheard by: Andrea
Employee: I worked 12 hours over this month, so I have some comp time on the books. I need to use 30 minutes of that tomorrow so I can leave a little early to go to the doctor.
Boss: Well, I don’t think that’s going to work. There are only 5 other people here that afternoon, and I am taking a two hour lunch tomorrow.
1600 Charleston Avenue
Mattoon, Illinois
Assistant: You ever do something repeatedly–so much, that you’re like, “Whoa, this isn’t real. I’m not doing this!”?
Intern: Umm…
Assistant: Like, when you’re staring at your face in the mirror for so long that you’re like, “Whoa! That’s not my face! This isn’t real!” Hasn’t that ever happened to you?
Intern: No. That’s usually when I stop drinking.
900 2nd Street NE
Washington, DC
Student walking into class late: The bad news is, I am late. The good news is that my intramural football team won the championship.
Professor: What is your team’s name?
Student: The Jack Bauers.
Professor: Is that the guy from 24? I can’t get into that show…
Student: Because you hate freedom?
Capital University Law School
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: captain awesome
Office monkey #1: I am so mad at John. I just scheduled three meetings for him on Thursday morning. Don't ask me how I pulled that rabbit out of my ass!
Office monkey #2: Wow…where'd you get the expression “pulling a rabbit out of your ass?”
Office monkey #1: Because pulling a rabbit out of a hat is easy!
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Wondering how to pull a rabbit out…
Worker returning from smoke break: Sorry I'm back so late. I found a dog!
Montreal
Canadia
Overheard by: I share an office with him
Employee on phone: Yeah, I’m leaving early today…Because if I don’t, I’ll kill someone. No, I mean it, someone will literally die at my hands, so I figure I’m helping out the company by leaving early.
900 Commonwealth Avenue
Boston, Massachusetts
Younger girl: So the guy who played Kramer turned 57 this week. I had no idea he was that old!
Older woman: Kramer? You mean from the movie Kramer vs. Kramer?
Younger girl: Who? Um, no. Kramer. Kramer from Seinfeld.
Older woman: Who?
Younger woman: This is probably why we don’t talk more, huh?
323 East Grand River
Howell, Michigan
Overheard by: Pam Beasley
Drone on phone: Give me a couple of minutes and I’ll call you back in an hour.
4867 West Sunset Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
