Sexuality

Boss: (reaches for candy from office candy jar)
Subordinate: Don't eat the chocolate bunny candies, those things are creepy.
Boss: I've put weirder things in my mouth.

Manhattan, New York

Middle aged TA, muttering to computer: Oh, look! It's an anal party!

Middle School
Iowa

Overheard by: former NYer

Co-worker #1: Ew!
Co-worker #2: What?
Co-worker #1: His internet history has porn on it!
Co-worker #2: Really?
Co-worker #1: Yeah!
Co-worker #2: Like what?
Co-worker #1: A whole bunch of free stuff from [Fleshbot].com. I can’t believe this.
Co-worker #2: Yeah, I know…
Co-worker #1: I mean…I don’t care if he does this at home, but not at this computer…We work in here!
Co-worker #2: Yeah…Sure…What was that site again?

41 West Clinton Avenue
Tenafly, New Jersey

IT guy #1: Hey, you want to hear something ironic?
IT guy #2: Yes! Tell me something erotic!

Hopkinsville, Kentucky

Overheard by: will1966

20-something chick #1: Yeah, can I get a ham and cheese sandwich on fellatio bread.
20-something chick #2: Ummm, I think it’s called ‘focaccia’ bread…

Lafayette, Indiana

Contractor: I mean, I don't want to just jerk her off…

Cary, North Carolina

Cube dweller: I hear you got a new person in your department. That should help with the load.
IT geek: Yeah. Too bad she's fat and ugly.
Cube dweller: But you'd fuck her anyway if you got the chance. Right?
IT geek (sighing): Yeah, I probably would.

Woodland Hills, California

Overheard by: Gunboat

Gay server #1: We’ll be meeting that non-lesbian who looks just like a guy.
Gay server #2: Dibs on her anus.
[pause]Gay server #1: It’s always about the anus with you, isn’t it?

Circle Centre Mall
Indianapolis, Indiana

Overheard by: Shatmandu

Office lady to coworker: I don't mean to be offensive, but he's a handsome rapist.

Oakland, California

Overheard by: Jennifer

Boss (walks in and says, deadpan): My wife had a stripper over this weekend and now my entire house smells like coconut oil.

Victoria Parade
Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: Feeling inqdequate about MY weekend…