Religion

Editor: Alright, I'm outta here, have a nice night.
Reporter: Be careful! It's sunny out there!

Manahawkin, New Jersey

Overheard by: inothernews

Coworker helping boss: If I was Jesus, you'd be washing your hands right now.

Scottsdale, Arizona

Overheard by: Time

Six-year-old camper #1: I'm half Jewish and half Irish!
Six-year-old camper #2: I'm half Finnish and half Polish!
Six-year-old camper #3: I'm a quarter sign-language!

Look Park
Florence, Massachusetts

Boss: Someone submitted an underage Nazi girls site to our search engine? Are you fucking kidding me? As a Jew and a pornographer, this offends me on so many levels.

Virginia Ave
Seattle, Washington

Coworker #1: Right?
Coworker #2: Right! [Pause.] What did I just agree to?
Coworker #3: We’re blaming the Jews for traffic congestion.

West 57th Street
New York City, New York

Male cube dweller: Isn’t that the church where they had the wet t-shirt contest?
Female cube dweller: That was a baptism!
Male cube dweller: Oh…

McLean, Virginia

Coworker: Oh my god, you still have Jesus on your pencil.

Pilot Road
Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: Sex Writer Goddess

Coworker #1: Yeah, we should go ahead and fix that. Then, when we’re done, we could dance around it like pagans.
Coworker #2: What? I don’t even know what to say to you sometimes.
Coworker #1: Just stand back and pity my mother.

Washington, DC

Underling to boss, incredulous: The lord was cock-blocking you?!
Boss: Sure! It’s in the bible!

Los Angeles, California

Clueless bible-thumper chick: Everyone should have to see “Passion of the Christ” so they wouldn’t take our Lord’s name in vain anymore. And do you notice how it’s only God’s name that they use? You never hear anyone saying “Oh, Muhammad Ali this, or Muhammad Ali that”.

San Diego, California

Overheard by: Poor Jebus