And I Won't Deny Him His Crystal Meth

Chatty IT guy: He's 94 years old. Who cares if he's a heroin addict?

Kansas City, Missouri

Posted on November 8, 2017
Age and ageing, Missouri, Questions, Substance Use & Abuse, Tech People, Weirdness

It’s Snobby in California

Product Manager #1: It’s Spring Break.
Product Manager #2: How come we don’t get Spring Break?
Intern #1: Because you’re no longer young.
Intern #2: Or pretty.

777 4th Street
Los Angeles, California

Posted on November 6, 2017
Bosses, California, Comebacks, Gripes, Insults, Interns & Temps, Physical Appearance, Questions, Time Management

Never Bring Your Kids to Work, Dear Reader

VP to secretary's six-year-old daughter: “Hot fireman,” as in “cute” or as in “sweaty”?

568 Broadway, NYC

Posted on November 4, 2017
Bosses, Kids, New York, Questions, Weirdness, Words

Just a Little One

Cubicle #1: Oh no, today is Tuesday the 13th! Does that mean anything?
Cubicle #2: Umm… Today is the 12th. Tomorrow is the 13th. And humpday!
Cubicle #1: Oh no! Wednesday the 13th! Does that mean anything?
Cubicle #2: Well, it’s the day before Valentine’s Day. You got your wife something already, right?
Cubicle #1: Dang! I better think of something quick, right?
Cubicle #2: You haven’t gotten a card or anything?
Cubicle #1: Well, I did actually get her a gift. But I opened up my trunk yesterday and it smelled funny so I took it back.
Cubicle #2: … It wasn’t a puppy, was it?

England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina

Posted on October 26, 2017
Animals, Coworkers, Cubicles, Employees, Holidays, North Carolina, Questions, Relationships, Sensory Experiences

Oh, Honey…

Cube mate to another, about program: How are you hung?

Baton Rouge, Louisiana

Posted on October 17, 2017
Body Parts, Coworkers, Louisiana, Questions

Maybe He Has a Lead on Carmen Sandiego

Admin, screaming into phone: What do you want me to do? I can't do this now, I'm at work! (pause) Well, I can't deal with this now, I'm working! I don't know what to tell you! (pause) I don't have any damn money!! I spent all my money on that private investigator! (pause) I can't do this now, I'm at work!
Boss: Sarah, in my office now.
Admin: I have to go, my boss needs me.

Manhattan, New York

Overheard by: Jeremy Hawn

Posted on October 15, 2017
Admins, Bosses, Money, New York, On the phone, Questions, Time Management, Weirdness

…Taters?

Male cube rat #1: What was that guy's name you just hung up with?
(simultaneously)
Male cube rat #2: What are you doing for lunch?
Female cube rat: Dick.

New York City, New York

Posted on October 14, 2017
Coworkers, Cubicles, Default, Employees, Names, New York, Questions, Sexuality

You Need More Women Friends, Bonnie

Office girl: Dude, I took a weird deuce this morning!
Office guy: What? How?
Office girl: Have you ever seen anyone make a funnel cake?

Durham, North Carolina

Posted on October 13, 2017
Coworkers, Meals and Snacks, North Carolina, Questions

I Told You Duct Tape Will Fix Anything

Worker #1: Did you hear about the industrial accident the other day?
Worker #2: No, what happened?
Worker #1: A cable broke and took out his whole left side!
Worker #2: Oh no!
Worker #1: It's okay, he's all right now.

Marysville, Washington

Overheard by: Noah

Posted on October 11, 2017
Accidents, Body Parts, Coworkers, General Idiocy, Health & Hygiene, Questions, Washington

Says So on Her Jeans

Younger coworker: Oh, had her water broken?
Grandmotherly coworker: No, not yet.
Younger coworker: So, what was all the liquid then?
Grandmotherly coworker: I don't know. She's just juicy, I guess.

Kalamazoo, Michigan

Overheard by: Sorry I caught up with them

Posted on October 9, 2017
Body Parts, Coworkers, Health & Hygiene, Michigan, Questions, Sexuality

Questions